𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄 𝐌𝐄𝐑𝐌𝐀𝐈𝐃, steve rogers

21. WAKE UP, SIREN

ARIEL POV — Awfully weak I lay in my warm bed, slowly opened my tired eyes and felt sluggish, almost a bit paralyzed even. I was awake, well I think so, but my body was almost motionless. I couldn't move, I really did try. Maybe i was just dreaming?

"Hey, wake up." the familiar voice called. "Hey." the voice again repeated and pulled me more and more from my completely empty thoughts back to reality. "What is it?" they asked me.

"Wanda?" I mumbled tiredly and finally realized who the familiar voice belonged to, though hardly any words came out of my mouth. But it was definitely her. The concern and the accent gave her away. Why was I in so much pain? I wanted cry, but even that I couldn't do.

Please make it stop, Wanda.
I'm scared. I'm so scared.
Please, Wanda. Please.

I begged her, hoping she was reading my mind at that moment. She didn't answer tho.

"Did I have another nightmare?" I mumbled, rather to myself. After all, the witch could control and read both emotions and thoughts. Maybe my cries for help in my sleep, gave me away, once again?

Sometimes when I couldn't close my eyes anymore after a nightmare, she came into my room, comforting and laying down next to me, holding me tightly in her secure arms. She gave the best hugs, like a soft teddy bear.

I wanted her to pull me into her arms, like she always did. And I wanted her to say, that everything will be alright. Please Wanda. I begged once again, but kinda felt pathetic afterwards.

She never responded.

Through my half-open eyes, I saw how she was sitting next to me, gently stroking my forehead and head with her hand, whispering calming things to me and trying to wake me up. Her green eyes, her brown hair and her soft angel voice...

I was feeling numb, my throat felt so dry, my eyesight was a little blurry. All I felt was a chaos and some kind of noise in my head. "Wake up." She asked, while her hand now brushed from my temple to my cheek. "We were all so worried about you." Said her voice, which then sounded so caring it made me smile.

I took several deep breaths in and out as my chest rose and fell with the same rhythm. Every breath that came out of my lungs was so incredibly difficult for me. Either I was sick or Tony had raised the temperature in the compound a little too much, because it was extremely warm ... too warm, but also kind of freezing cold. Maybe I had a fever? I could feel the cold wet sweat on my forehead.

"You were gone for such a long time." She spoke worried and gently held my weak, motionless hand while I continued to stare into her face. Normally her touch felt loving, warm and safe. But this time it almost felt strange ... my hands were probably numb.

Sometimes I asked myself whether it was better to feel absolutely nothing or to feel everything.

But if I had to give an answer to the question, it would be that I would rather want to feel everything.

Never in my life have I felt so much love and affection in the last few months. And yes, I was scared, very scared in fact. I wasn't used to being part of something new that could feel so beautiful ... And at first I thought, I wouldn't deserve all of this. Bucky, Nat. Sam, Tony, Wanda, Clint, Thor, Vision ... and Steve. They made me remember what feeling at home was like. They were my friends, my family. So yes, I'd still want to feel pain because there are stronger feelings than pain. Grief could pass, as could pain or hatred.

Family is forever.

"I know you can hear me." Her encouraging voice whispered again. Wanda was never the kind of person who would let anyone down. No matter what training session with her: every time she was by my side ... always cheering me on, always got the best out of me and never lost faith in me ... even if I sometimes did.

I closed my eyes and took another deep breath, hoping that it would eventually become easier to breathe. Was it possible that I was over exaggerating it too much with my training? Was that why I could hardly move or even stay awake at this point?

And then she spoke one last time.
"We missed you, Siren."