[39] We should talk

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The taxi ride to the hotel was rather awkward. I was looking out the window while Lisa was sneaking glances at me from time to time. I saw it in my peripheral vision. 

"Why's your hair black?" I asked her suddenly without looking at her, watching Seoul's skyline rush past us.

"Because... I felt like it, I guess..." she shrugged. "Do you not like it?" She sounded a bit unsure. I wasn't used to that.

"I didn't say that." 

I did like it. Made her look even sexier. More mature. Damn her!

I felt her eyes on me. I fell silent again after that.

*

"Where's your luggage?" I couldn't help but ask, looking at her little backpack as we walked through the door of her hotel room after she checked in. She couldn't have been travelling with just that, right? Her head snapped to me, probably noticing my slightly softer tone compared to before.

"Rosie and Jisoo took it with them..." she answered. I just nodded.

Right. This had all been planned. I was going to kill Jisoo as soon as I would get a hold of her. Jimin and Jungkook were also dead meat!

Lisa let her backpack drop to the ground and sat down on the edge of the bed, tapping the spot next to her with her hand. I ignored her and sat down on the armchair in front of the window instead. Safety distance, you know.

Lisa sighed quietly and turned around on the bed to face me. 

"Kitten, I don't know where to start..."

Everytime she used one of those damned petnames for me, I felt my walls begin to crumble more and more. Nevertheless I just looked at her silently, not willing to help her. I had layed my cards open before we said goodbye in Bali, telling her that I didn't want to loose her. She had to figure this one out by herself!

"In Bali... you asked me... what would happen to us... but my head was too occupied by... uncertainty of the future... and... my stupid fear of... of getting hurt again... that I completely failed to realize the most important thing...." She trailed off, looking away from me. I could tell how hard this was for her.

"And what is that?" I asked quietly in a much gentler voice than before. I was so nervous about what she was going to say. 

"I know I fucked up and I'm so sorry for messing everything up. I'm sorry for... hurting you like I did... only because I failed to realize, that..." She inhaled deeply before meeting my eyes more firmly than before. 

"I failed to realize that... I love you..." she confessed in a whisper. 

My heart stopped, then it began beating erratically. 

Did I hear her right?

Did she just tell me she loved me?

Did I have a stroke?

"Kitten, please breathe!" Lisa stretched an arm out towards me with worried eyes. I blinked rapidly, realizing that I had held my breath for the last fifteen seconds or so. I breathed in deeply and the worry in Lisa's eyes turned into relief.

I didn't know what to say. "Lisa... I..." I trailed off exhaustedly. 

"Please don't tell me it's too late! Please just give me one more chance. I know I fucked up so bad! But I have thought so much about how we could make us work." Lisa kept babbling out nervously. She was so cute when she was nervous. The tips of her ears were completely red and her eyes were unsure of where to look. But her words had caught me completely off guard.

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