Ana taught me (N.H.au )

Lesson 3) Lying is better

IM FUCKING MISERABLE ITS BEEN 24 HOURS SINCE ZAYN LEft AND I JUST CANT. I WONT STOP THIS STORY I KEEP ZAYN AS A CHARACTAR CUS' HE'LL ALWAYS BE A PART OF ONE DIRECTION 5/5 I NOT 4/4 I WONT STOP AND I KEEP THE HOPE HE COMES BACK AFTER A FEW MONTHS AND SAYS HE MISSES US AND EVERYTHING WILL BE FINE AGAIN. SORRY IM JUST BROKEN UPDATES WILL TAKE LONGER TO UPDATE.
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*edited*

Niall's POV

Start weight: 163 lbs
Current weight: 150lbs

I'm doing pretty good but i'm not thin yet. I'm still disgusting so I have to change all my habits.
I open the cabinet of my nightstand and throw all the hidden chocolate and candy I have in the bin.
"I'm proud of you Ni" ana said.

'Niall! Dinner baby' I pull my hair in stress , I don't want dinner.
'Okay' I said , running downstairs.
My mom places a plate with mac & cheese in the front of me.
I stare at it in fear , I used to love mac&cheese and now the only thing that plays a role is the calories.
'Where are you waiting for? Attack' my mom said , I look at her with pleading eyes 'I'm not feeling quite well' I lied 'Maybe you should just try to eat something' my mom said stern.
I take a bite and regret it immidiatly , i'm feeling sick and before I know i'm already at the toilet vomiting.
'So you are really not feeling well' my mom said. I feel satisfied by what I threw up.

"Good job Horan , you puked your apple from your breakfast" Ana said.

'Go upstairs and lay in bed, if you feel hungry just shout' my mom said I nod. I decide to text Harry to say I'm ill.

To Hazza: I'm ill :(

I get a text back immidiatly

From Hazza: argh get better soon Ni! Should I visit you? I can bring you some of your fav chocolates ;)

To Hazza: Thank mate , uhm you don't have to come I threw up so I won't enjoy the chocolate you would bring :/

'I wouldn't enjoy the chocolate anyway' I said to myself.
I let some silent tears fall from my eyes. I feel extreemly lonely and unloved at the moment without any reason at all.
My earplugs got my eye and I take them off my nightstand.
I search for some depressed songs and find a song called Cry from Alexx Calise.
I listen to it on a high volume and let myself drift away with the dark lyrics and sad musical parts.

~*~
'Niall sweetheart, I called your school to say your ill do you want anything to eat?' My mom said waking me up.
I sigh heavily 'No' I said crawling deeper in my blankets.
'Okay' my mom said sad and leaves me alone.

Hours later I wake up from a hard noise and see Liam standing in my room 'Why are you in my room!' I yelled shocked because wtf and i'm still tired.
'Sorry, I was gonna see if you were okay because Harry said your ill' he explained. 'Oh, that's nice' I said awkward , Liam sits down on my bed.
'How are you feeling?' He asked , I shrug 'Tired , sick , tired oh and did I say Tired' Liam chuckled 'Don't you have History at this moment?' I asked , he laughs 'Yeah I actually have' he said.
'Can you go please i'm really tired' I said not really nice 'Uhm that's okay I see you around' he said awkward.
'Get better soon' Liam said.

"You still have to weight yourself" Ana said. I sigh deep and get up.

I stare at the scale , my palms are getting sweaty I don't want to stand on it. I take a step and look anxious at the numbers on the scale. 143.
I lost 7lbs , thank god.

"Don't be to happy Horan there's still a lot you have to lose and you can't eat anything and from now on you have to vomit" Ana said.

Harry's POV ( Shock lol )
'Where's Nialler, boo?' Louis asked arm around my waist. I look around to see if anyone is watching me and Louis.
'He's ill' I said placing a kiss on Louis' cheek.
'He's acting weird lately you sure he's real ill or just faking it' Louis said.
'He's real' Liam said walking to us 'how do you know Li?' Louis asked , letting his arm fall from my waist.
'I decide to have a look because I caught him crying 2 days after each other' Liam explained 'He cried? When?' I asked worried.
'Yesterday I caught him sitting on a bench in the park hands covering his eyes crying out loud' Liam explained , my heart shatters I hate it when Niall is sad. And I hate it even more when he cries.
'That's worst' Louis said 'That's not even all , two days ago I also caught him crying in the toilets he tried to deny he was upset' Liam said.
'Maybe there's more wrong with Niall than I always think' I said.
'Why the pouty faces?' Zayn asked joining us. 'Niall's ill' I said , Zayn rolls his eyes 'He isn't death guys don't be dramatic we can miss his loud laugh for one day' Zayn said.
I feel myself tense up 'Sorry that I give a fuck about my friends' I said angry.
Louis pulls me back on my sleeve 'Come Haz let's get some fresh air' I look at him angrily , he takes a step back.
I hated when I do that to people , scare them with my anger but I can't let Zayn talk shit about Niall.
'You are such a drama queen' Zayn said , my mind says hit him hard a cross the face but I can't do that.
'Suffocate in it Zayn' I said walking away , he doesn't know Niall like I know him and a day without Niall is a day not lived.

I'm on my way to Niall's house when I see his dad 'Harry!' His dad said , I smile at him 'Hello Mr Horan' I said.
'C'mon Harry call me Bobby , How are you doing?' He said 'I'm good , what about you Bobby?' I asked politely.
'I'm doing great actually , don't you have to be in school' his dad asked suspicious. 'Uhm I wanted to visit Niall' I said honestly his dad smiles 'That's nice' he said.
'I won't stop you any longer from what you were doing , have a nice day Mis- Bobby' I said with a dimpled smile.

I knock on the door and Niall's mom opens it , she got red puffy eyes 'Oh Harry come in' she said with a fake smile.
'Are you alright Mrs Horan?' I asked worried 'Not really happy that's all' she said 'Do you want a cup of tea sweetheart?' She asked to change the subject.
'If that isn't a bother' I said polite 'Oh I almost forget i'm here for Niall' I said.
'Harry can you do something for me? and ask my baby what's wrong he isn't eating properly and he's spending more time upstairs than ever' She said with pleading eyes , I feel a lump in my throat 'O-of course I didn't know he wasn't eating like he used to but I saw his change in behavior on school' I said.
'Please I want to know what's wrong with my baby boy' she said.
'I come back for my tea with Niall okay?' I said , she only nods.

I knock on his door 'Come in' he said in a raspy voice. When I open the door I see he's paler then his white blankets.
'You are terribly pale' I said sitting down on his bed.
'How are you doing Nialler?' I asked worried 'm fine just tired' he said.
'Do you eat proper?' I decide to just ask it , I see him frown 'Course why woulden't I?' He said still frowning.
'Your mom told me you weren't eating proper so I thought let's ask' I explained , he sighs and rolls his eyes 'I skipped it a few times but that was because I had to do lots of homework and you know about the cabinet' He said opening the cabinet where all his chocolates and stuff in lay.
But it's empty 'it's empty' I said confused 'Duh I ate it empty' he said with a giggle.
'I missed your giggles' I said , he smiles at me but I feel my stomach twist and I don't know why.
'Should we go downstairs Ni?' I asked 'That's okay to me' he said.

'Thank you for the tea Mrs Horan' I said 'You can call me Maura love you know that' she said.
I take a sip of my tea and look at Niall he stares at nothing.
'You okay Ni?' I asked he wakes up out of whatever he was with his mind.
'Uh sorry yes just in deep thoughts' he said with a chuckle.
'Do you want something to eat actually Harry?' His mom asked 'Uhm yes please' I said.
'Niall?' Maura asked 'no thanks' he said her smile falls.
'He wants' I said with a smile glancing at him he looks at me confused.
Maura comes back with cookies.
I begin eating mine but Niall only stares at it in horror. 'Niall why do you look at the cookie like it's gonna eat you instead of you eating it' I asked laughing at myself in my mind.
'What no i'm just looking at it' he said not even convinced by himself.
'Eat it' I said he takes a bite and chews really slow I decide to ignore it.

When he finally finish it , I realise that I have to tell Niall about Louis and I.
'Niall uhm , me and Louis are in a relationship' I said feeling the heat rising up to my cheeks.
'That's amazing! You two are made for each other! it is a miracle that there isn't a label in your neck with "made for Louis Tomlinson" ' I burst into laughing.
'I'm really really happy for you' Niall said hugging me.
'Oh almost forget , it's a secret me and Louis are both not out of the closet...' I said without a smile.
'Oh don't you think that's gonna be complicated? I mean Louis is you know popular and I don't know how everyone is gonna react' He said.
'That's true but we want to fight for it' I said desperate.
'Then it's worth it Haz' He said with a smile.
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Still crying