Lonely Hearts

Chapter nine: Lincoln

"Where are they, Emily?" I demanded, bursting into her office.

She looked up, mildly concerned.

"Lincoln we've been over this." She sighed, "I can't give out confidential information about our clients. I told you I would give you more information when you proved yourself responsible."

"It's been three years. Longer. Let me out of this shithole. I don't need this. I don't need the home. I don't need you." I growled. "What I need is to find my sisters. Where are they?"

"Lincoln, calm down." She spoke through gritted teeth, pushing her chair away. "Your sisters are safe. They're happy. Don't mess this up for them."

"How do you know they're happy?" I asked, quietly.

"I've visited them personally. I've questioned your sisters. They told me they were ok."

A shift in her expression told me she was lying.

"You will tell me where they are." I said, softly. "You will."

"I can't." She replied, her Scottish accent thickening her words. "I'm sorry."

"That's not good enough." I shouted. "Tell me where they are."

She paused and steepled her fingers together, holding onto her patience.

"Lincoln, take a breath and calm down. If you calm down, I will let you call them." She bartered.

I shook my head, tears misting my eyes. Why didn't she see? Why didn't anyone understand?

"That's not good enough anymore."

I turned around and walked out, wiping away the tears that escaped at the painful inevitability of what comes next. Despite everything, I wasn't ready to say goodbye to the place that had become home over the last few years.

~*~

I begun to have second and third thoughts as I packed some clothes and money into a bag. If this went wrong - and it would go wrong - then I would be in trouble. Big trouble. Much bigger than I had been in the past. This could place me on all kinds of records. Risk-assessment, at-risk register, social isolation list. But I couldn't take it anymore.

It had been three years. Three years of no contact. No letters. No calls. Nothing. And I was sick of waiting for someone to tell me when and how I could see my sisters. They weren't going to let me. I was never going to be ready. At this rate, I wouldn't see them until I was eighteen and able to sign out of this place. I wasn't going to wait any more. I wasn't.

I looked around the tiny room I had called home for eleven years. The familiarity of everything I was leaving behind tugged at my heartstrings. Despite everything, I had built a home here. I had people I cared about.

But there was nobody I cared about more about than my sisters.

I'm coming to find you, Emma. Just like I promised.

I remembered her tear-stained face when she said goodbye. When I told her that I would be waiting for her no matter how long it took. I had made promises to her, to both of them, promises I intended to keep.

And no one was going to stop me this time.

I looked at the bag again, lifting it up and marvelling - or despairing - at how light it was. All the things I had in the whole world were in this bag. Everything I had once cared about fitting neatly into the seams of a small backpack.

No matter, soon enough, even the contents of this backpack would be worthless. The only thing that mattered to me - that truly mattered - were the two girls I was going to find.

Once I saw them again, I would know. My world was complete.

Don't get your hopes up, Lincoln. I reminded myself, shouldering my bag with a sigh to test it's weight and durability. A lot has changed in three years.

A lot has changed, but two things remained constant. Emma and Max.

A knock on the door made me turn around with a smile, opening the door, I relaxed on seeing her smiling eyes before taking one last look at the place that was meant to be home but wasn't.

For once, I wasn't doing this alone. I had a hand to hold through it. And I had never been more grateful that it was hers.

~*~

We walked along, quietly, not because we were creeping around or anything, but because, despite everything, we didn't really have much to talk about. We didn't really know each other. Not really.

So why did she agree to do this?

I watched her as she walked beside me, quietly confident and self-assured. She walked like she always broke out of children's homes with strange boys in search of their missing sisters and I wondered what her story was. Though I would never dare ask without permission.

No one ended up in the children's home with a happy story. I knew that better than anyone.

We arrived outside of the door to the office where we would sign out and I took a deep breath before meeting Skye's gaze.

"Ready?" I asked, a hand already on the door, silently challenging her to go through with this.

She met my gaze with a kind of steely determination I used to see in Mum's eyes and it struck me how much she reminded me of her. She had the same confidence, the same kindness in her eyes.

She stepped forward and tilted her head at me.

"We're really going to do this?" She whispered.

"Yeah." I said, with a half-smile. "Keep your cool and everything will be fine."

I turned around and pushed the door open, allowing her to walk through and sign herself out before following.

"Where are you two off to?" Ellis the receptionist asked.

"A walk around town. I need to get some fresh air." I lied, easily. "She's coming to keep me in line."

He chuckled and I saw Skye raise an eyebrow.

"Good." He said. "What time will you be back?"

"Unknown." I muttered, signing my name.

He gave me a look. "Does Head know about this?"

"She doesn't have to. I'm not on probation anymore." I shrugged.

He sighed. "Just behave, Lincoln. I don't want to get any calls saying you've been causing trouble."

"But it's what I do best." I said, turning to Skye with a grin as she signed her name. She gave a small chuckle and I loved the way her eyes lit up.

Ellis rolled his eyes. "Have fun, you two. Skye, keep an eye on him for me."

"Will do, Ellis." She said with a laugh, flicking her hair over her shoulder.

We sauntered out of the building without him questioning our backpacks and I felt almost giddy with relief. Out of nowhere, I started laughing and once I started I couldn't stop. It must have been infectious because a couple of minutes later, Skye did the same. We giggled with relief and excitement and a little fear at what lay ahead. But at least we weren't doing it alone.

We shared a look and I felt hope blossom in my chest the way it hadn't done in years.

I was going to find them. Even if I didn't know where they were. All I had to do was start looking.

I could figure the rest out later. For now, I was trying, and that was what mattered.