Living with Handsome Satan (book 2)

Chapter 27

It is opening ceremony day and I am so excited but also nervous. The games are actually beginning now and I want Matt to win gold more than anything I have ever wanted in my entire life. It is something he dreamed of for years but never thought would happen and now it is so close and fuck does he need something good. The last few months have been hell, a hell he was suffering through to protect me. A part of me keeps waiting for the anger to hit, to be mad about what he put me through during all of this but I can't find it in me. He was just as miserable as me about the breakup and on top of that going through something unimaginable all by himself.

While I couldn't find it in me to be mad I definitely felt a rollercoaster of emotions this week. Monday after leaving his room so he could go to sleep and not interrupt his training I got back to my room and lost it. I thought I cried a lot after our break up but that was nothing compared to my breakdown Monday night. Around Matt I try not to let him see that he was right that the news sits ever present at the back of my mind, but it does. Every happy moment is contaminated with the thought that this could be the last or I only have so many of those left. I hold his hand a little tighter now and hug him a little longer trying to get in every single second left. I hate it but I can't just forget that Matt told me he is basically dying and there is no stopping it.

No stopping it. Fuck.

Monday after I got back to my room and somewhere between screaming life wasn't fair and crying so hard I nearly threw up I talked to Amanda. She is way ahead of me on the research stuff and told me while there are two trials neither stop it. They delay and make it less painful but the end result is still the end result.

I push away the dark thoughts as the hotel door opens. Matt drops down into the king size bed next to me and pulls me into his arms. The last 4 days this has become our routine.

In the morning I have to work from 5am to 6am which is around the time Matt gets up. After work I go back to sleep for a little bit while Matt trains and does whatever else he does; I will be honest sometimes he talks and everything he says goes right over my head. Anyways after that at around 10am he comes over and we spend the rest of the day until his afternoon workout together. That usually consists of laying in bed for a while then some sightseeing and a light lunch before his workout. For afternoon workouts Sanderson lets me watch. He said he liked having me around because I am super critical and bully Matt to be better. I wouldn't call it bullying per say. After that Matt showers and we go to dinner and then he brings me back to my hotel room before heading back to his room to go to bed. He is usually in bed by 9-9:30 and then I work from 10pm to midnight. This system makes sure I am signed on for the first 2 hours of the work day and the last hour.

"Morning my girl," Matt mumbles into my hair as he rolls us both so we are on our sides.

"Morning, how was training?"

"Uneventful. My parents land in about 2 hours so what would you like to do? Any sights we haven't seen you want to do just us?"

I will miss having Matt all to myself but I am excited to have his family here and my family will be coming next weekend along with Lance and Matts high school coach.

Matt still has a while before he competes; his first day wrestling isn't until August 4th and it is July 23rd but you can tell last night that with people beginning to compete the friendly atmosphere is slowly shifting to a more competitive one.

"No, I want a few hours of just Matt time, please and thank you."

"That I can happily give," he tells me before grabbing the back of my head and bringing our lips together.

I have been extremely clingy this entire week but Matt is eating it up. He loves how I want to be touching him at all times or how I will sneak a kiss whenever I can. We haven't gone past heavy make outs since I arrived but knowing we probably won't get this alone time again until we return home and knowing it has been months since I felt all of him, I seize the moment.