Helveryst Series #2 : The Cassanova and The Hater

Chapter 18 - Hotseat

ZEKIAH XYRIEL'S POV

"Tama na 'yan, limang bote na ang nainom mo. May pasok pa tayo bukas at alam kong magkaka-hangover ka. Let me take you to your condo."

Sinubukan niya akong alalayan pero winaksi ko ang kamay niya at nagsalin ng panibagong Bacardi Rum sa baso ko. It's the only thing that can help me forget those problems I'm carrying right now. If I could just put it down and leave behind. If I could just erase them on my memories so that I wouldn't get hurt like this. If I could just pretend like nothing happened.

B-But how could I if the pain is still attached to my heart?

"J-Just let me...Ali. Hindi ko kayang kontrolin ang sarili ko dahil sa samut-saring pait at sakit na nararamdaman ko ngayon. I thought I could get through all of it. Akala ko hindi na ako iiyak nang dahil sa kanila. But look at me now, I'm in a mess."

I even tasted my tears because of crying so hard. Good thing we're in the dark side of the bar so no one could see me crying like a baby. Everyone might think that the real Zeriel is weak. That's why I'm pretending that I'm tough in front of them so that they can't pull me down.

Naranasan ko nang hilahin pababa at pagtawanan ng iba kaya hinding hindi ako makakapayag na mangyari ulit 'yon sa'kin.

"It's okay to cry, couz. Ilabas mo na lahat, nandito lang ako. Hindi kita iiwan at pababayaan kagaya ng ginawa nila sa'yo. Come here." Inalo niya ako at kalaunan ay niyakap din para pakalmahin ako.

I cried and cried on her shoulders. She's the only person that comforts me and knows my weaknesses. She never did leave by my side and belittled me like what others do. She always lift me up and boost my confidence even in the darkest days of my life. She was there, when no one was. She's my cousin, my best friend, and considered as my sister.

Kaya ko ang lahat kapag nandito siya sa tabi ko. Hindi niya ako pinabayaan kagaya nang ginawa nila sa'kin.

"Bakit gano'n? Okay naman na ulit kami ni Mom, ah? Kaya naming mabuhay nang wala ang walang silbi kong ama. It's hard for us to live again after he left us hanging and begging for him to come back. And now he's coming back to ask for my forgiveness like it all happened yesterday? How dare he?!"

"Alam ko, naiintindihan kita. Kung ako rin naman ang nasa posisyon mo, gagawin ko rin ang ginagawa mo ngayon. Kaya tahan na, 'wag ka nang uminom."

I sat properly, looking at her intently."No, don't say that. You will live in a normal life forever, okay? Hindi ka matutulad sa'kin. I can't let it happen to you. Okay lang kung ako. Sanay na ako dito. Your mother is responsible and your father is a good man. Siguro galit ako sa lahat ng lalaki pero hindi kasama ro'n ang Daddy mo. I wish I also have a complete family like what you have. But I realized that you deserve it and I'm happy for you."

"My family is also yours, Zeriel. We're cousins and my parents also treats you the way they treated me. Magkapatid na rin tayo 'di ba?" A tear escaped from her eyes as it was followed by another and another.

I immediately wiped her tears away as I hugged her so tight. Kung may mga kahinaan man ako, isa na ro'n ang makitang umiiyak ang pinsan ko lalo na kung dahil lang naman sa'kin. I don't deserve her tears but here she is, staying with me whatever I want to do.

"Couz, papasok ako ah."

I know that she entered my room when I heard the sound of the door closed. Nakatalikod lang ako sa pinto habang nakahiga sa kama ko at nakatulala lang sa kawalan. I don't want to get off my bed and I'm lazy to make any single move. In short, wala akong gana sa lahat.

"It's been two days since you locked yourself inside your room. Hindi ka lumalabas ng condo mo para magpahangin. Ayaw mo ring kumain hangga't hindi kita dinadalhan. Your two days absent will give you a headache, Zeriel. Isipin mo, tambakan ng projects at mga paperworks ang kakaharapin mo kahit dalawang araw ka lang na absent. C'mon, I already give you time for yourself. Due date na ngayon, sige na."