For those who are eternal

9

Over the course of 2 months, Kwame stayed at my place; at my request, pleading and begging though.

Call me selfish but I didn't want to leave him alone.

He said he was from Ghana and came here seeking greener pastures.

When he told me that, I honestly wondered why anyone would come here of all places. We were still colonized and life wasn't so easy. Not that I had any right to complain though as I came from a stable family.

Greener pastures weren't his only reason for coming here though. He never told me but, I had a feeling he came here for peace of mind.

Something in his eyes told me that he wanted to leave this planet as soon as possible and that was the main reason I never wanted him out of my sight.

I had heard that you grow fond of what you see every day; especially if that thing was mysterious.

Kwame was a mystery alright. The way he handled situations, the way he didn't seem to talk at all, or the way he cooked.

One would call him an old man; I mean our 90-year-old neighbour calls him sir.

I wondered where he amassed such knowledge or level of calmness. Maybe that was where I fell in love with the mystery called Kwame.

However, there was a problem.

While I was in the wheelchair, I enjoyed the attention he gave me but the only issue I had were his eyes.

Those eyes which wanted to leave this planet as soon as possible were replaced with one that wanted to take care of me not out of love but... guilt.

Some days, he'd apologize about my injury.

I never understood why he apologized.

It wasn't his fault that I saved him.

It wasn't his fault for thinking about ending his life.

It was no one's fault.

I'd tell him time and time again that I was only at the right place and the right time.

"I told you not to think about it," I said for the last time as sternly as I could, "I just happened to be at the right place and at the right time."

He sighed and looked away.

I wheeled over to him and grabbed his face then kissed him. It wasn't our first kiss though.

He blinked twice and raised a brow.

"I'm not a paedophile," I chuckled softly, "I'm seriously in love with you Kwame. And although I'm older than you, I'll be willing to submit."

I tried to kiss him again but he looked away.

"Kwame? Is everything alright?" I asked. This wasn't the first time he did that.

He got up to leave.

"Kwame? What's wrong?" I asked as I grabbed his hand, "Don't leave, please."

I was scared.

I honestly didn't want him to leave.

I forced myself to stand.

I knew he was going to make me sit but I hugged him.

Deep down, I had a feeling why he didn't want to look at me with interest.

One of the reasons could've been my accident and the other...

"Stay, please," was all I asked.

I noticed the guilt in his eyes slowly faded.

My sister always told me to do whatever it took to make sure the one I cared about or loved would look at me with eyes that would be intent on mine and mine alone.

Asking him to bathe me was one of the ways I thought I could speed up the way he looked at me with wanting eyes, even if it meant lust.

I watched him in anger as he washed my body. His member laid still as if he was bathing his younger brother or something.

I wasn't angry at him though; I was angry at the disappointment of a body that I had. If only there were bigger, maybe he'd notice me.

Although I knew Kwame wasn't interested in voluptuous women, I just remembered what Eze did to me and couldn't help but feel annoyed at my body.

When I thought everything was going to be fine, it happened; I got my healing.

I thought this meant he'd no longer look at me with eyes of guilt anymore, but it looked like I was wrong.

Sure the guilt wasn't there anymore, but his eyes were slowly leaving me.

He started to become lost in thought.

Sometimes I'd hear him talking to someone.

After the accident which I found strange that I survived with no bruises, his eyes seemed to leave me faster.

I watched helplessly as my little sandcastle I had barely finished building get slowly washed away by waves I never knew existed.

Everything I did seemed to be just me throwing myself at him.

The other reason his eyes weren't focused on me anymore was simple; there was someone else he was interested in or loved.

I knew it from the beginning. I had always thought the reason he wanted to commit suicide was that the one he cared about, died or betrayed him or flat out rejected him.

I thought I could fill the void in his heart and help him start life anew but it seemed impossible. Whoever his love was, she was back in his life; and that meant I was nothing more than a hindrance.

Of course, there was the option of having the same ending as my parents, but I wanted something genuine. Like my sister said, I'd only be the one truly happy.

Maybe it was best if I ended things between us and support his relationship with the one he loves.

I heard him talking to someone again after coming back home.

"What's happening?" I asked already expecting his reply.

He shook his head negatively.

"Can we talk?" I asked, "It's about us."

This wasn't going to be easy.

God give me strength.

End of Arc 2