If There Was Love For Me

1 - Another Option

It was barely noon, but Maria had finished her duties for the day and taken her seat in the window of the drawing room. Here she had taken her paper, ink and quill to write to the Sisters of Eastrose, asking to join the convent as soon as possible. She had taken a long time to make her decision between the many convents of the land.

 Eastrose, as far as she knew, would give her the most opportunities to learn, teach and help, allowing their female members to study french, history, medicine, theology, literature and even mathematics. They had a public school and a hospital for the people, where Maria was sure to find work she could be pleased with. 

There were actually rumors of even more liberal things going on behind closed doors, between the sisters. Of course those were only rumors, but Maria was at a point of desperation, were rumors were everything she needed. Apart from that she had long given up on the idea of there being a love for her, so even if the rumors turned out to be false she could have a pleasant and quiet life, far away from everything that reminded her of her misery.

Still, the quill had barely scratched her first sentence, as her mother entered the room.

"Maria, my dear, how was your day? Did you hear anything interesting?" Quill and ink where fast forgotten as Maria greeted her mother with a hug.

"No, Mother, I barely talked to anybody. Only Johanna, when we went to the market, but we never talk about those things. She told me about the book she was reading and I told her about mine."

"I must be blessed by god, to have been given such an intelligent daughter. No son could ever best you."

"Said by a mother who has only one daughter. You don't know how you would like me, if you had a son."

"I know that I would still love you just the same, Maria. You know that. You are everything I could ever wish for." Maria just smiled at that, because she knew her mother meant every word she said. Instead she decided to focus on the important thing.

"Since you are here in the middle of the day I assume you have something to tell me. Is everything all right?"

"Oh, everything is wonderful. In fact I am here with quiet good news for you. I have talked to the king and he has offered you a position as Maid in Waiting for the princess." Now Maria felt es necessary to get up to express her shock at those news.

"But there are no free positions in the princesses court."

"You see, this is why you need to talk to people. This morning Amora was caught stealing a gold necklace and was fired immediately. Since I discovered her I could convince the King to let me suggest a replacement. I hope it is okay that I suggested you? If you don't want to I understand completely, I just thought this would give you some other option beside the convent."

"I could stay closer to you."

"I didn't want to say it, but yes. I would miss you a lot if you were to leave to Eastrose. It is so far away."

"I would miss you too." Maria paused for a moment to think about the option that was presented to her. She knew that becoming a Maid in Waiting wasn't something you should say no to, but she also knew that being a Maid in Waiting was something that could get you killed, imprisoned, or at least of worse than before. Still, she would miss her mother if she were to move away. "I can always join a convent. Becoming a Maid in Waiting is an amazing opportunity."

"Are you sure? Because if it isn't what makes you happy I don't want you to do it. It is your life and you should not do anything just because it is expected of you. Am I being clear?"

"Clear as a mirror, but I am sure. You must be aware that I would miss you just as much as you would miss me, and I could not stand to be separated from you by such a long distance. Just... promise me you didn't make the story about Amora up, just to give me an opportunity."

"Of course not!" Now her mother finally closed the distance to lay a hand on her shoulder. "I know how much you hate all the manipulating and lying of the court. I did what I did to make sure you could live your life in peace and safety. So that you could chose any life you wanted, no matter what that looks like. I can take care of my own success with out using my daughter as a cheap pawn."

"Okay then. I will... what exactly do I do now?"