Sitio Series 3: Scheming List

Chapter 41

Meter

“Another award for Miss Smile! Truly, she's born to be a star!”

“Ang swerte niya!”

“Paglaki ko gusto kong maging katulad niya.”

I felt him walked beside me in the night, so quietly that I thought he was mute. I had to peek at him constantly to be sure he was still there, the darkness suit us well.

Clasper led the way to our hotel suit, “I’ll go to the  appointment first thing in the morning.” I just chuckled while barefooted walking towards the king size bed. “Are you going to be okay?” I can sense the concern on his voice, “you’ll meet your bestfriend tommorow right?”

The fragrance coming off my skin smelled dangerous. It would make me more confident, I like intense things. I wasn't afraid to sacrifice everything to be on the top. How funny, the world seems to change drastically. Before I was just silently wishing to be on the top without stepping anyone but for some inconvenience I realized a important essence in life. That I should have done sooner, in order to survive learn to sacrifice, learn to step all those bugs blocking the way. “I’ll be okay," I answered with assurance. “Bibisita ka ba sa memorial pagkatapos?”Clasper stopped in the midway of undressing. “Stop blaming yourself. Past is past,”

He smiled bitterly. “Easy to say. Wrecked people do know how to give advises huh?”

I winked at him. “Of course, after all experience is the best teacher. ” Tinapik ko ang espasyo sa kama, tumitig si Clasper bago humiga. I was only wearing a night dress while he was wearing a sweat shirt and topless. Nothing to be afraid nor to shy off. It's normal for us even seeing each other naked. “If you can turn back time. What will you do?” Unconsciously asked.

Clasper hummed. After ten incredibly long seconds, he took a deep breath. “I shouldn't had left. And everything will be okay.” I clenched my fist the not so very peaceful life we had is slowly shattering to the point we have nothing to hide. “In the end despite of achieving everything the regret always weigh much than happiness. What about you?” He asked.

I lifted my hands as if I'm trying to reach the ceiling. “I don't know but one thing for sure, worthless person doesn't deserve me nor even saying my name. All happened in the past is a permanent nightmare. Na kahit anong hilod ko o ligo ramdam ko pa rin ang mga markang ‘yon, na kahit sa pagpikit paulit-ulit na ipinapakita sa akin ang lahat, sa bawat pagtibok ng puso ko ramdam ko ang pait. And you know what Clasper?” I stared blankly at him, I didn't even notice that he's on top of me. “There’s always regrets on everything kahit anong pag-iwas ang gagawin mo hindi mo iyon maiiwasan. That's why, do things that satisfying then regret later, after all beyond this tired soul there's one place we desperately want to see to end everything.”He held my hand and placed it on his cheeks, he then started kissing it with his eyes focused on me.

There's only you and I on this mess.

___________

Wearing my vintage outfit I did a pose as the camera flashed. This is my daily routine, waking up in a bed with Clasper beside me and working until dawn. I waited impatiently while tapping my forefinger on the table it was so hard to hide my identity on the public. Deiry and I decided to meet after years of being apart. How I miss my bestfriend who's always on my side the only thing is the fault that I've done on her.

I was the one that cut out connection with each other she was continuously making a way to reach me out but I shrugged it off afraid of something she'll find out. Part of my head was sorting through the fact on my memory and speculation trying to think what move shall I take..