When no one's watching

Chapter 7

3rd person's pov:

Butterflies were going crazy in his stomach as Liam pulled him closer.
And it made him freak out completely.

So Louis was right?
He liked Liam?
He liked a boy?
He was gay?

Zayn was breathing quite heavily and couldn't comprehend the situation that had just occurred. He wanted to curl himself up in a ball.
Nothing made sense anymore.
He had never felt something like that before and it was driving him crazy.
How messed up did a person have to be to fall for someone after such a short time?
...And for the same gender.

Zayn never had anything against any member of the LGBTQ+ community. He supported everyone and since his best friend was openly gay and had a boyfriend, it was just a normal everyday thing he lived with.

But it was something different since he had just discovered something he had never felt before.
There was this weird, overwhelming feeling and it felt like his world was crashing down on top of him.
But why? Wasn't it something beautiful to fall in love?

No, not if it came like a slap straight into the face.

Tears were filling his eyes again. And it was horrible since he didn't have an idea of why he was crying.

Anger. He was angry at himself but couldn't identify why.

And maybe he also felt sadness because he had fallen for a broken boy who couldn't open up to him.

And fear. The fear of losing the person he had just discovered he was liking more than a friend. If he'd do something to himself Zayn couldn't ever live the same anymore.

And with those thoughts, Zayn made a promise to himself.

But it was something that was extremely sensitive for some people and off-limit.
But he had to know.

Even if he knew he would regret it and was breaking some kind of unspoken promise, he carefully tried to roll up Liam's sleeve.

But then he realized what he was doing there. Trying to take advantage of Liam in a vulnerable moment, when he was asleep.
Suddenly, Zayn felt extremely bad for his actions and decided to just ask Liam tomorrow and try to make him trust him.

Finally, he dozed off into a restless sleep, being cuddled up with Liam.

Zayn's pov:

As I woke up, I panicked in first place since I wasn't in my own bed nor house and someone was laying next to me...very close.

I looked to my left and saw Liam laying there and suddenly, all the events from the last night replayed in my mind.

I had found Liam completely under the influence of alcohol.
He even passed out and I had to call Louis.

My breath hitched as I remembered what I had been feeling as Liam was so close to me.
Oh no, this couldn't be happening.

I jumped out of -I was supposing- Liam's bed and made my way out.
It was freaking me out that Louis had been correct with his assumption.
Goddamnit, I liked Liam!
Liam James Payne!
The popular guy from the football team, the womanizer, the guy I always thought was disgusting for making out with every single girl.

How fast the tables turn, huh?

Abruptly, a noise interrupted my thoughts and I flinched.
Luckily it was just Liam who was standing in the hallway, rubbing his eyes sleepily.

He looked horrible, obviously hang-over. He was holding his head and squeezing his eyes shut.

"How're you feeling, Liam?" Somehow, I was nervous being around him. It made me uncomfortable, knowing that I was feeling something for him that I wasn't allowed or supposed to feel.

"I've got quite a headache but we got to get to school! It has started already." His voice sounded raspy and worn out from all the crying.

"Don't worry, I have signed us off for today. Also, can you remember anything from yesterday?"

As he shook his head, I started to explain what had happened. After I had finished, he looked at me with puppy eyes and mumbled a "I'm so sorry, Zayn."

He then stepped closer to me and it triggered something in me. I flinched and backed out. Suddenly, I felt panic and I couldn't think clear anymore.
"Sorry Liam. I can't- please don't come closer."

He looked at me with widened eyes, a look of shock and sadness overcoming him.
"Wha-what did I do wrong?" He whispered quietly to himself.

I couldn't stand it anymore, the hurt look in his eyes showing that I had hurt him badly with my statement.

And then I ran.
Out of the door and down the street.
I ran further and further, the houses around me getting less and less.

Since I was little I had always been running from my problems.
Maybe thinking I could somehow leave them behind.
Of course that wasn't working, but I still kept doing it.

I ran until my lungs were burning and my heart was racing.
I stopped and let my hands rest on my thighs for support until my breath was back to normal.

Shit, why did I even run away?
Liam had looked so hurt and I just ran.
What a goddamn idiot I was, it was incomprehensible!

After I had sat down on the ground, of what had turned out to be a little forest for a while, I decided it was the best to go and apologize to Liam.

Even if there was a complete mess in my brain, I had to find a good excuse for my bitchy behavior towards him.