Thoughts Of A Broken Girl

1yr

Dear love,
            Its been a year. I still blame myself partially. I still think about calling you. I miss you with all my heart and it hurts like hell. I dont know what else to say other than I love you and I fucking miss you. I miss you more than anyone would've thought. Im sorry we never had our chance. I would have married you I wont lie. I love you.
Remember that night in my jeep, my first car who woulda known I'd be so into cars years later. You were a blind date basically we have never met in person, you were so funny. You got mad at him for flirting with me and put your hand on my thigh to calm my nerves or just get in my pants but either way it was nice. You were the first guy I ever really did anything with. I remember you telling me to wait for you when you got locked up. I remember you always calling me out of the blue, once a month at the least. I miss hearing your voice its sad to say I almost forget how you sound. I have many regrets in life and not giving you a shot is at the top of the list. God I miss you. I was a childish idiot. You said last time you wanted to take me out and get me a ring and marry me one day and I shot it down. I shouldn't have maybe you would still be here. I just don't know anymore. But the love I have for you will forever be in my heart. Even when I don't talk to you like I do now. You'll always be there in my mind. I hope you know that. I may block out alot of things but the memories of you will always remain in there. I love you with all my heart. I cannot wait to see you again baby❤️ as much as I made fun and was a bitch you knew thats how I was and we argued but it was never a fuck you argument. God I love you so much I miss you and I cant say it enough. I'll see you again my beautiful boy.