Caramel - MYG

22

Yoongi

By the time the music stops, I'm so exhausted, I'm ready to sit down and never get back up again. The rest of the group are all in their finishing positions around me, the sound of ragged breathing filling the air.

"How many times have we practised Boy With Luv?" Seokjin asks. He's bent over at the middle and he speaks so quietly, I almost don't hear him.

I raise a hand to push my hair back, the sweaty strands refusing to unstick from my forehead.

"I think that was number 20." I say, but out of the corner of my eye, I can see Taehyung shake his head.

"No, we've definitely done more practises than that." Taehyung sounds even more drained than I do, "Or maybe I'm getting it confused with all the other times we've practised that song this year. We've practised Boy With Luv a lot this year."

Namjoon huffs out a laugh from his place sat on the floor, "It's definitely been a prominent song, that's for sure. But I think Yoongi Hyung's right, it's been about 20 times today. How many does that mean we have left?"

He directs his question to Hoseok, who is crouching next to the Maknae. I glance over at the two of them, cracking the barest of smiles at the sight of Jungkook sprawled face first on the floor, his arms spread out like a starfish.

"About 10 or 15 I think. Since we're performing this song a lot at the award shows and festivals, Sungdeuk wants us to be perfect." Hoseok answers and Jungkook groans from beside him, "You okay Kookie?"

"Bored," Jungkook's voice is slightly muffled as he's lying against the floor, "I want to practise something else."

Hoseok reaches out and tiredly ruffles Jungkook's hair, "Sorry Kook, but we can't. We still have a few bits in Boy With Luv that need to be ironed out. Come on, let's all just get this done and then we can rest."

It's at this moment that I'm hit with a wave of exhaustion so hard, the room starts spinning. I grasp out with one hand, managing to find someone's shoulder and I grip it as the spinning gets more severe. I'm starting to panic now, my already uneven breathing worsening. For a few seconds it's like I'm back at one of our concerts, barely keeping it together behind stage, but this is far worse. A voice brings me back into the present moment.

"Hyung? Are you okay?" Jimin's voice sounds distant and almost foggy, as if he's miles away. I can barely feel it when he places a hand on my arm to steady me.

My heartbeat is in my ears, erratic and scarily loud. I now finally realise that I've pushed myself too far and that all the overworking myself during practise has led to this. My vision starts to blacken at the edges, just as my legs give way from under me.

***

When my eyes open, I find that I'm disorientated for a second and I have no idea where I am. Then my vision focuses and I not only recognise the room I'm in, but the worried face opposite me. Charlie's cheeks are slightly tear streaked and I purposefully avoid her gaze, since I can already picture the heart breaking look in her eyes and I know that seeing that in real life, would break me.

We're in my studio and I'm lying on my sofa, a cushion placed under my head. Charlie is sitting next to me in a chair, her hands clasped together in her lap.

Slowly, I try to raise myself up into a sitting position, but Charlie reaches out and stops me from sitting up. I frown at her action, but when my head starts to spin again, I decide that staying lying down wouldn't be such a bad idea.

"How are you feeling Yoongs?" Charlie's voice is quiet and slightly raspy from crying.

"Not great."

She frowns at my reply and shakes her head, "I think it's worse than that Yoongi. Please stop trying to shut me out and tell me what's actually going on."