Leaving my love behind

Chapter 39

Bailey's POV:

The sound of flatlining floods the O.R, but I'm not going to stop, we can't stop.  Meredith has a family waiting for her here, she needs to survive, we need her to survive.

"Push one of epi! Start compressions!"

Meredith's POV:

"Derek! Derek!" 

Please I need Derek to come back, I'm not ready to leave Derek and the girls yet, I want to see Eliza and Amelia grow up, I want to have more kids with Derek, I want to grow old with Derek. 

I need to leave this place, I can't stay here any longer I want to fight I want to go home, I was so close to going home.

Derek- "Meredith? I'm here."

He's back, I run towards him and hug him for dear life which is a bit ironic as I'm quite certain I just avoided death.

//

Derek's POV:

Meredith has been in surgery for a few hours and my anxiety is through the roof, I can't help but blame myself for letting this happen if I had just listened to Meredith this would have not happened this is all my fault.

Ellis- "Derek, I've just heard how is she doing?"

Oh my god, I forgot to tell Ellis, god damn it.

"Uh- I think she doing okay, I'm due for an update soon. Please sit down."

"Derek, how did this happen? How did happen again she was supposed to be in bed."

"I know, I know, we were on our way to daycare and I got paged a 911. I asked a nurse to take Meredith back to her room, I didn't know I swear I didn't know the nurse was Taylor I would have taken her myself if I knew. This is all my fault."

"Derek, I don't want you sitting here blaming yourself, you're a surgeon you were paged, Meredith will understand, how were you supposed to know what Taylor looked like? Tell me, Derek, if the positions were swapped would you want Meredith blaming herself?"

I never thought about it that way, that although I didn't hear Meredith's protests, I didn't know what Taylor looked like and that if the roles were reversed I wouldn't want Meredith blaming herself.

"No, I wouldn't it would be unfair for her to blame herself."

"Exactly Derek, so as much as it is hard, don't blame yourself it isn't good for you or Meredith if you continue to do so. Now would you like some coffee while we wait for an update?"

"Yes please, that would be amazing."

//

Still Derek's POV:

It's been another hour and we have no updates, the surgeon and rational side of me is now long gone and has been replaced with the boyfriend and irrational side where I am thinking of every single possibility on why we haven't gotten an update yet. And in all of my possible outcomes 9/10 always goes to crashing or death, so I need someone to give me a damn update.

"Derek, who's that doctor coming over? I haven't gotten a chance to meet everyone yet."

I look up from the ground and income Miranda, it's hard to tell what kind of news she is bringing but we prepare for the worst and hope for the best.

Bailey- "Derek, Ellis. Meredith's injuries weren't as bad as we thought she had some internal bleeding and some external bleeding from the head trauma. She also broke her already broken leg again as well as her ribs, I know that it seems a lot but they are all injuries that were easy to fix. She did although crash once on the table-."

"Bailey did she make!"

Bailey- "Derek, if you had let me finish, we got her heart starting again, and she is now in recovery. She will be still asleep and it's hard to tell at the point how long she will be out for, but we are hopeful that without complications she will be fine physically, but Derek mentally this is a step back in her recovery."

"I understand, thank you for saving her it means so much to me. Can I go see her now?"

Ellis- "Thank you...Dr. Bailey, thank you for saving my daughter and Amelia and Eliza's mother. Thank you."

Bailey- "Yes, you may go see her, her room is 1447 and it's no problem she is my intern after all."

I couldn't get out of the waiting room fast enough, I needed to see that Meredith was okay for myself as much as Bailey's words comforted me and put me at ease I need to see it to believe it. But first, I am going to pick Amelia and Eliza up, they need their mother and their mother needs them.

//

I'm walking towards Meredith's room, and all I've noticed is the constant stares and sympathetic looks from everyone, and when I say everyone I mean EVERYONE, it's actually quite annoying really. Meredith doesn't need people talking and gossiping about her again not now not after this.

*Amelia starts crying*

*Derek picks Amelia up*

"sshhh, it's okay, it's going to be okay. I know mummy hasn't been around lately and you miss her but she is getting better, shhhhh it's going to be okay."

I'm not sure who I was trying to convince more Amelia or myself.

....

We finally reached Meredith's room, after many stops for diaper changing and feeding but now we are here standing outside, I'm trying to brace myself for what I am about to see and I'm being honest I don't know what to expect except for the worst.

*Door creaks open*

There she is, sleeping in the hospital bed which makes her seem so small and vulnerable in the bed, and my heart breaks a little more for the pain she has endured.

"Hi Mer, we're here all three of us waiting for you to wake up. We love you."

Hi everyone so sorry for the very late update of this story, so with this story, I am going to maybe make happier after this topic so more family-based but let me know what you all think.

Don't forget to vote and comment :)

Have a great day <3