Who Are You? (A Marvel FanFic)

Memories

Wellllll, that was a longer break then I expected. I truly apologize (again) for my lack of updating! Life kind of got super busy, but I'm back! If you're reading this, thank you for sticking around, and I hope you enjoy this chapter x

At dinner, Steve is explaining things about the war to Thor, which has also captured everyone else's attention except for yours.

As you twirl the pasta around your fork, lost in thought, Tony calls to you, "Hey, Mystery. You good over there?" 

When you look-up, you see his attention, as well as a few others, is now on you, "Hm? Yea, fine." You finally eat the fork-full of pasta.

Everyone gets back to talking and finishing up their meals, but Loki looks to you, "Are you sure you are alright?"

You nod and repeat yourself, "Fine."

Later, when everyone is back in their rooms, you decide to find the first Harry Potter book on your shelf. Once you have it, you teleport yourself to Loki's door and knock.

You do not hear footsteps, but Loki opens his door, "Y/N." He greets and looks down at your hands.

"Sorry for coming so late, but I wanted to give you this," you place the book in his hand.  "You seem like more of a book-worm than a movie watcher."

Loki squints his eyes, "I am no worm. I could probably shapeshift into one though." He lifts the book and studies it for a second.

You laugh, "It's an expression, meaning you like to read a lot and know quite a bit about books."

Loki nods in understanding, but then you take-in what else he had said, "Hang on, you can SHAPESHIFT?!"

"Maybe I should not have told you that and just scared you one day as a snake outside of your door," Loki grins leaning on his doorframe.

"Well," you fold your arms, "I happen to like snakes, so I probably would have just carried the snake into my room and cuddled with it on the bed."

Loki's eyes widen, "Is that so?"

Your eyes widen as well, when you realize how what you've just said must have sounded, "NOT knowing it was you as the snake of course...."

"Am I that repulsive?" Loki tilts his head up, the smirk still slightly on his face.

"It varies from moment to moment," you bite your top lip and drop your arms to yours sides. "But no; you just don't seem to be the....cuddling type."

"Well, you will never see me doing so, even with my oaf of a brother," he straightens back up.

You laugh at the image in your brain, "I think it would be quite cute though!"

Loki's face turns more serious, "No. Absolutely not. Remove any thought of that from your mind at once."

You take some pretend steps away, "I'll just go let Thor know..."

"No you don't," Loki follows and suddenly spins you against the wall next to his door.

"Ok, ok. I was just messing around," you say laughing. "Now, let me go, Loki."

Loki continues to hold you there, your faces less than a foot apart, both of your breathing slowing down.

"Loki..." you swallow, bringing your eyes to his, laughing almost gone.

"....yes, right. Sorry," he steps back, releasing your arms.

You begin to walk back to your room, but need to rid the hall of tension, "Let me know when you're done with that book; I'll give you the next."

Loki turns back from his doorway, "I will. Thank you, Y/N." He watches you close your door almost all the way, before closing his for the night.

The next morning, you're down in the training room with Loki. 

"Y/N, focus," Loki's dodging your blasts, but he can tell something is still off from last night.

Your mind drifts back to Steve's stories of his past that he was telling at dinner, which causes you to miss one of Loki's blasts back at you.

The blast sends you into one of the padded walls, but Loki still calls out to you, "Y/N!" Before you know it, he is at your side, "With me training you, your blocking and attention should be better by now."

"I'm ok; thanks for asking," you look-up at Loki, rolling your shoulders to check for pain.

Loki shrugs and holds out his hand to help you up, "You appeared alright when I came over."

"Physically, I'm alright," you mumble as you grab his hand and stand.

Loki throws you a water, "Why did you lie to Stark and all of us yesterday?"

Your eyes dart to Loki mid-sip, "I...I didn't lie..."

"You did. God of Lies, remember?" He winks at you.

You laugh a little and look down, swirling the water in the bottle.

"No remark back? This IS serious," Loki moves to stand next to you, leaning on the wall.

You sigh, "I'm....going to ask Tony if there's someone who can bring my memories back."

Loki leans off of the wall once more, "Is that what you truly desire?"

"Yes," you pause. "I have no recollection of my life before I was 14 years old. It's blank. Nothing."

Loki takes a breath, "I cannot imagine how that must be."

You lean your head back, hearing the sincerity in Loki's voice.

"I did learn....something about my past, which some may say I did not take quite well. It is not the same, but..." his voice trails off.

Your hand leaves your side and holds Loki's lightly, which causes him to immediately look down.

When you feel his hesitation, you take your hand away, "Sorry; I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

Loki licks his top lip, "You did no such thing." He shifts awkwardly and then clears his throat, "I do think you should talk to Stark about your memories though."

"Trying to get rid of me?" you nudge his shoulder as you both start to walk back to the main room.

"Quite the opposite. You may be one of the few people I do not mind having around here," Loki nudges you as well.

"Two compliments in one week? Slow down, Prince Charming," you catch a smile cross Loki's face as you round the corner for lunch.