My Life

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"So how's the shop doing?" Dad asks as we eat lunch.

"Uh, it's pretty good. Yeah, we get a lot of regulars. It's kind of become a little family."

"Sometimes we have music nights and Momma has lots of fun. But then she makes me leave once people get too excited," Syd cuts in.

"Music nights, huh? Is that really an appropriate environment for a five year old?" my dad asks, side eyeing me.

"It's perfectly appropriate for her. And you have no right to question my parenting so stay out of it," I reply coldly.

He clears his throat and forces a quiet apology.

My phone dings and I check it under the table as Syd and my father start up a small conversation.

Flo: I just landed. Ugh, why is it so hot?? How's it going with your dad?

Me: Oh shut up and enjoy the weather. It's tense but at least he and Syd are getting along.

Flo: Remember that you don't have to keep him around just because of Syd. Your feelings matter just as much.

I bite the inside of my cheek as I read her message again. What if she's right? What if it would be better to just cut him out of my life? But what if that hurts Syd and-

"Momma, are you okay? Did you get a text from Florence?"

"I'm fine, baby. Yeah, her flight just landed."

"Who's Florence?" my father asks curiously.

"Just a friend of ours," I say vaguely.

"Right."

The remainder of lunch is spent drowning in thick silence.

-

"Ash, he's here. My dad is here. I can't fucking stand this," I whisper in the phone, hiding out in my bedroom.

"What? Why is that douchebag here? I'll kill him. I swear to god, I'll come over and kick his ass right now."

"No, Ash, you can't kill him. He's still Syd's grandfather, which is the only reason I told him he could come visit."

She's silent for a moment. "Are you okay? I know it can be a lot," she says gently.

"I'm fine, I guess. I just want to get this over with already. He's not leaving until Saturday."

"He'll be gone before you know it, okay? And I swear to god, Y/N, if he says anything to you about Mark, you better tell me so I can kill him," Ash says in a dangerously low voice.

"You'll be my first call," I promise.

-
A sharp knock echoes through the apartment, awaking me from my sleep. It's the middle of the night? Who the hell is at my apartment?

I tiptoe through the living room and pull open the front door. "Flo? What are you doing here? I thought you were in LA."

"I came back. I needed to talk to you. Y/N, I know we've been dancing around this but I can't stop thinking about you." Her eyes are glimmering with hope and her face is lit up with passion as she speaks. "I know it's late but I couldn't wait until morning. I can't stop thinking about what it would be like to hold you and love you and kiss you. So will you please let me kiss you?"

"I..." I don't know what to say, so I just nod dumbly. She takes two confident steps forward and grabs the collar of my shirt, pulling my lips into hers. Her lips are cold but soon warm up against my own. She grabs my waist and spins me around, pinning me up against the wall. Her tongue slips into my mouth and I moan quietly.

"Fuck, Y/N. You have no idea how long I've wanted this," she mumbles against my lips.

"Stop talking and kiss me," I demand. She grabs the underside of my thighs and hoists me up, holding my legs around her waist.

"God, I can't wait to make you-"

She's cut off by faint yelling and my eyes flutter open. "Momma, get up! I want pancakes!"

"What?" I mumble in confusion, sitting up and looking around my bedroom. It was a dream. It was a fucking dream.

"Can we have pancakes please?" Syd asks again.

"Uh, yeah, sure. Just let me take a quick shower first."

"Okay fine. I'll get the stuff out." She skips into the kitchen and I sigh into the empty bedroom. I stumble into the bathroom and flick on the light. Noticing the bright red flush coating my cheeks, I flip off my reflection and mumble "Get it together."

When I come out of the bathroom, Syd and my father are talking in the kitchen.

"Grandpa, tell me more about my dad please."

"Well, his name is Mark, and he used to play football. He was the best quarterback in the state." Anger quickly boils up in my chest at their conversation. Why the fuck is he talking about him? "And I'm not sure how your mother knew him, but I'm glad she did because-"

"Dad," I cut him off. "What are you doing?"

"I was just telling Syd about her dad. What's wrong?"

"What's wrong? You know exactly what's wrong. Syd, can you go play in your room for a minute, please?"

"But I don't wanna," she grumbles.

"Syd, go." She sighs, but trudges to her room.

"You have no right. You have no right to talk to her about her father or anything, for that matter. It is up to me, her mother, what I tell her and I've chosen to not tell her about that poor excuse for a human. So either learn to shut up, or leave. Okay?"

"Okay. I'm sorry. I just don't get why you don't want to tell her about him. He's a good guy, Y/N. I thought we were over all this nonsense."

My heart nearly stops in my chest. I scoff, letting out a breathy laugh of anger. Seeing his face, looking the same as it did when he threw me out, I give up. I give up on him. "Get out," I tell him.

"What?"

"Get the fuck out. I don't want you around my kid."

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