Stung by a Bee || Tubbo Angst

🐝 Chapter 5: Hospital

Trigger warning !! This chapter contains:
Heavy mention of self-harm
Stitches
Slight fighting
Needles
Hospital

This chapter contains heavy angst. If you're uncomfortable reading this I advise you leave the story now, stay safe! Ily <3
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Tubbo's POV:

I was still talking to Wilbur when ranboo walked up to me, he tapped my shoulder. Then, looking over at him in confusion. He pulls something from his pocket.

"Tubbo we need to talk." He says as he holds a razor blade in the air.

No.. no no no no. That can't be, did I leave it somewhere? Surely I thought I put it away with the others. It- it has blood on it so it's definitely the one I'd used. Fuck, this can't be happening. He's been here a few days and I've already ruined his stay no no no. Wait Wilbur's here, ranboo won't do anything further while he's here. Right?

"W- what's that Ranboo?" I say, trying to keep my voice from shaking. My eyes advert their gaze to wilbur, who is staring at both I and ranboo. His eyes seem widened a bit, like his head is full of concern or confusion.

"I don't know tubbo, you tell me. It was in your room, it has blood on it. Now that sounds like a problem to me. What could you possibly be doing with a stray razor blade with blood on it? It could only mean you are, oh I don't know, harming yourself?" He says in a soft but stern tone.

My throat runs dry and shiver runs down my spine. I can't escape this conversation, and wilbur. No no Wilbur can't know, well now he knows! Of course he's probably going to sit here and listen to this conversation.

"It- I- fine, okay! Yes I'm fucking cutting myself again. Are you happy now..?" My voice trembles and tears start to form in my eyes.

"Tubbo I don't mean to make your upset, I just want to help you.. we both know that this isn't healthy or good for you. This will hurt you more and I know, that you know that too." He says in a hushed tone. All I can feel are tears running rapidly down my face.

"I can't help it, i just need to hurt to feel better!" i sob whilst wiping my eyes with my sleeve. To no avail though, tears made my vision blurred.
I turn and face wilbur's direction again, his eyes look so sympathetic and he reaches out a hand to my shoulder. Ranboo and Wilbur both comfort me with words and actions.

"Tubbo.. would you be willing to show me your wounds please? I just want to see if you need medical attention for them." Ranboo replies as he takes a seat next to me. His hand rubbing circles on my back in a way of comfort.

At first I shake my head but eventually give in. His eyes immediately widen in shock and he stands up hurriedly.

"T-tubbo.. these are really bad." His voice shakes. Uh oh. What have I done? Fuck. I shouldn't have shown him.

I stand up with my sleeves still rolled up, which had gave Wilbur a chance to glance at my arms. He too stands up and walks over to me, one hand lifting my arm and the other observing the wounds.

"These need to be stitched." He calls out to ranboo. Wilbur then adverts his gaze back onto my arm, running his hand gently over the wounds. He looks almost distraught, and full of sympathy.

"Hey tubbo bud.. why did you do this?" He asks, his voice smothered by sympathy.

"I.. well i- I.. I just feel really s-sad. And when I have panic attacks my brain automatically goes for the blade. It's like premeditated in my brain to hurt myself when I get like this. It's not like I enjoy doing it but I can't stop.." I say, my voice is smothered my guilt and begins to shake. I wipe my watery eyes once again.