Lost Hero

Pain

"Well, Ms. Percy, that was quite the fright you gave me," Alfred says, placing a cup of strong tea in front of Percy. It looked like she needed it. 

She was shaking and looked terrified, looking at the man as if he was about to lash out at her. Alfred felt bad, looking at the poor girl. He didn't understand why exactly she ended up materializing in the kitchen, looking as if she was half dead. He was sure she didn't exactly know either. So he did what he could, he sat her down in a chair with a blanket and made tea, pulling various sweets out, which she looked like she needed as well, her face having a distinctively drawn look it it. 

"So, you're going to tell Bruce and Dick?" 

It was the first time she spoke since his name when he first caught her. She was entirely silent, numbly accepting his manipulation of her and letting him wrap a blanket around her. He knew that she needed time to come to grasps with the situation, very likely this was the first time she used whatever ability she had. 

"No," 

At this, she looks up in surprise at his answer. Looking in her eyes, he sees confusion and pain in them. She was lost, he realized. The strong woman the house had come to know was just an act. It didn't seem as if she understood human decency judging by the disbelieving look on her face. 

"But...why? They're your employers and...something else. Why would you hide this from them? Why would you help me? I lied to you and to them, why aren't you angry?" Her words were broken, terrified. 

Oh, you poor girl.

"Percy, Bruce and Dick trust me to make the right decisions. So I'm making the decision to keep this from them. Right now, you need time. You wouldn't get that time if I were to tell them. And I have a feeling that you would have much more to explain than what happened tonight. So I'll let you keep your secrets for now," 

Percy didn't understand what to think, she didn't know what to do. This was completely outside what she would have expected if they found out the truth about her, or at least partially the truth. She was reeling. 

"It's alright, you don't have to explain or say anything. I'll go and let the masters know you've returned, through the front gate, of course," Alfred says, a smile on his face. 

Percy opens her mouth as if to say something else but changes her mind and smiles. 

"Thank you, Alfred," 

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Alfred left Percy in the kitchen nursing her cup of tea, she sat for hours, thinking. She didn't understand why Alfred was being this kind, she didn't understand why he wouldn't tell both Bruce and Dick. So she sat there, tea long gone. She didn't notice how Alfred came into the room, long ago not considering him a threat anymore, she didn't notice that the cup was filled with coffee, nor did she notice as he started making breakfast. 

Alfred wasn't surprised to find Percy still sitting in the kitchen in the same position he left her last night, staring numbly at her empty cup before he filled it. He knew that he should leave her, it was still early morning after all. Roy had called last night before she returned and said he would be picking her up in the morning so she wouldn't have to worry about being late to work again. They would really need to get her a car or some other way into the city. The best Alfred could do at the moment was make breakfast. 

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Percy only stirred from her trance, going on guard, when Bruce wandered in, looking for his morning coffee that was already waiting for him. He was surprised to see Percy still dressed from last night at the table. He wasn't surprised by Percy, she was usually up even before Alfred, but it did make him wonder why she was still dressed from last night. But Alfred shot him a look that made him swallow the questions already building in his throat. 

"Good morning Percy, Alfred. Roy will be here in half an hour, does that work for you?" Bruce asks, looking at Percy. Percy just looks at him, unblinking. 

"For work, Alfred, didn't you let her know?" Bruce asks, turning in confusion. It wasn't like the old butler to forget something like that. 

He narrows his eyes as the hand with the spatula stirring eggs hesitated for a moment. Something was off about him. 

"It must have slipped my mind, sir. Percy, Roy is coming to pick something up from Bruce and has offered to bring you into work," Alfred says and Alfred dropping the Ms doesn't go unnoticed by Bruce. 

"Oh, I should probably go get ready then," She says, standing and drinking the rest of her coffee. 

Walking out of the kitchen, she carefully dodges out of the way of Dick as he comes barreling into the kitchen, shirt untucked and tie slung around his neck. 

"Hi Percy, bye Percy!" He says, voice fast as he beelines towards the coffee pot. 

"Alfred, what happened last night? Percy was still dressed and you called her by her name," Bruce asks, peering as the butler piles eggs on a serving plate. 

"She had a rough night, Bruce. Don't worry, she's fine but something unsettled her," Alfred reassures. 

"Maybe she spotted Kaldur?" Dick offers. 

"Maybe," Bruce says, looking at the certainly empty doorway. 

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When Percy returned ten minutes later dressed in work clothes, something in her changed. She seemed lighter, and certainly more focused. But she was still distanced. Still separating herself from them. It made sense, she was technically their employee. That's the only relationship they could expect from her. 

Dick didn't seem to see anything but the eggs in front of him. His quick, cheerful mood from earlier was gone. Bruce and Alfred understood. Whenever he saw large quantities of food, he always remembered Wally. 

"It's not your fault," 

They were all startled at Percy's words. Looking at her, they couldn't figure out the look on her face. It wasn't pity because Percy wasn't the kind of person to pity another. It was regret, it was pain. Looking at her, it seemed as if she understood. 

"Whoever you're thinking about, it wasn't your fault they died," Percy's words are soft, carefully thought out. They had never heard her use that tone before. It was gentle as if expecting Dick to shatter right there in his chair. It looks like Dick is going to speak but Percy interrupts him.

"Don't object, listen. I don't care what happened, you didn't kill them. You don't have to say anything for me to see that. I've seen that look before in dozens of people. Just because you weren't able to save them, doesn't mean you killed them," 

Percy returns to eating her eggs, watching Dick out of the corner of her eye. He was shaking and it doesn't take long for tears to start streaming down his face, his hands clenched in his pants. Bruce goes forward to comfort him, but a sharp look from Percy stopped him in his tracks. He was frozen, staring at her eyes, seeing the same broken look he often saw in Dicks. She points her finger at the door and it's clear what her meaning is. Out. 

Alfred is already moving to the door and Bruce reluctantly follows him. Surprisingly, Percy follows them out of the kitchen door, closing it behind her. She sighs as a terrible sob echos out of the kitchen, wrenching all their hearts. 

"You need to leave him be. I know you want to comfort him right now, that would be any parent's instinct, but he needs to greave. You've been trying to protect him from the pain and that might be good for some people or even in other situations, but he's been ignoring his pain for too long. If he goes any longer, when he finally breaks, the resulting backlash will be even more devastating," 

Percy's tone is flat, almost emotionless. But somewhere in her voice is a sharp knife, cutting deep into both of them as Dick's wails of pain resound dully from the kitchen door. She knew the pain Dick was going through, the guilt he felt. She was in pain too, although she held it back, behind walls and behind the cold exterior she put on. 

"I'll go wait for Roy outside. Dick will come looking for you when he's ready, be there for him but don't smother him. Don't try to stop his pain, just be there for him," 

And with that she walks away, leaving both Alfred and Bruce staring after her.