Dreaming /#FebruaryJamFestival/

18. If you're still smiling

"I think you need to take some time off," Hyung Woo Ahn announced as he sat in the chair in front of Kwang's desk. Kwang had not expected this to be what his father said.

"What do you mean?" Kwang closed the chart he had been reviewing.

"Look, you've been a little unpredictable lately, and it's upsetting the staff. They are worried about your ability to do surgery."

"Have I made any errors? Has my quality decreased?" Kwang knew people had been gossiping about him, but not to this extent.

"No, but you have been rude to some patients. Several who have filed complaints."

"Rude?" Kwang couldn't think of when he might have been rude. But maybe that was the problem. He was rounding on his patients less and spending less time with them in general. He had his associates do most of the work and came in just for the surgery. This behavior was routine for many surgeons but not for Kwang.

"Look, people here hold you to a higher standard. You are well known for your skills and charm. The skills haven't changed, but the charm is lacking." Kwang's father shifted uncomfortably in his seat, then stood up and paced across the small office. "The board thinks you need a vacation. They don't know what triggered your behaviors. I've kept that to myself, though many saw you leave the fundraiser a few months ago with Ms. Lancaster, and your mood change corresponded with her engagement. So people are putting things together."

"Father, I don't want to take a break." Kwang wasn't sure what he would do if he didn't have work. "I can work on my behavior. I've started running again and am feeling much better."

"Good, then just take a week. Visit your mother. She has been asking about you."

"You've been talking to my mother?" Kwang couldn't remember the last time his father had mentioned his mother. Though their separation was amicable, his parents rarely had a reason to converse.

"She was worried. You haven't called her in a while." Hyung Hoo shrugged and then put his hands on the back of the chair he had abandoned. "Look, the board sent me as both the chairman and your father. You need to pull yourself together, or you will lose your department chairmanship."

"Have I been that bad?"

"If it wasn't you, I doubt anyone would have noticed," his father admitted. "But people associate a change in personality with a breakdown, and they don't want any patients harmed. So take a week, visit your mother, exercise a lot, and get over Jin Lancaster."

"I'm over here, dad," Kwang declared, earning a raised eyebrow from his father. "Or at least, I think I am."

"So you're saying if I told you she has an appointment with Dr. Bae today, your feet won't want to take you to hang outside his office?"

"Does she?"

"The fact that your first response to that question was not denial speaks volumes. Son, heartbreak is unpredictable. I get it. You just have to be able to pull yourself together more here."

"Does she have an appointment?" Kwang asked again, disappointed at his heart's desire to see her.

"You know I can't tell you that, even if I knew. She is a patient here and deserves her privacy. But she does still see Dr. Bae when needed. I'm not sure she's been here since her engagement." His father paused, then looked at Kwang with sympathy. "Look, if you were still smiling after all you have been through, I would have been more worried. But you can't be so rude. You are my son and pretty famous in your own right. People are watching you."

"Okay, you got me. I'll take a week, but I have scheduled surgeries for the rest of the year."

"I'll have Joon reschedule them. As of today, you are on a leave of absence."