new moon mission / loona

10- new secrets

"we need to talk."

chaewon almost flushed at the urgency of hyeju's statement.

"okay."

her wrist was grabbed and pulled into the closest closet, which happened to be the one she found hyeju in a couple nights ago.

"i don't know how much i told you that night i was drunk, but you cannot tell anyone anything. and you cannot bug me for anything more. when i need to talk about something i will talk."

"would you, do anything to get me to keep it a secret?" chaewon smirked as hyeju's face scrunched.

"i would say yes but i don't want to sign up for some kink i'm not into."

"i don't mean it that way, i mean i could force you to hang out with me more. wait- not into-?" chaewon coughed out the question.

"well hyunjin's turned to a total bitch so you might be seeing more of me."

hyeju had a glassy stare on her face. she slowly drew to the ground, looking just as defeated as the night chaewon found her.

she joined her on the ground, there was so little room in the closet their knees were touching.

"what did she do?"

hyeju closed her eyes and faced her head upwards, doing everything to avoid eye contact. "it's more of what she didn't do. this closet still smells like me because of it."

"not you, the alcohol."

"you'd be surprised how often i've smelled like alcohol in my life."

a breath left chaewon's mouth. "you'd be surprised how often i've been around that smell."

hyeju connected eyes with chaewon.

"it's fine. i'm away from it now. go on please."

hyeju stared at a space to the left of chaewon's head. they sat in what felt like comfortable silence for a couple minutes.

"hyunjin has the hots for heejin."

chaewon already figured this.

"i asked her to help me at the party, so i wouldn't wreck myself. then she left me. because of that heejin bitch. i have no clue how long she was in that bathroom, but it was long enough. i know it's not completely her fault, but if she knew she would be gone for a while and brought me with her i wouldn't still be dealing with what happened."

chaewon had no idea what she was trying to say, but she felt she shouldn't interrupt hyeju opening up while sober.

"i told her i'm not sure if i want to keep on hanging out with her because when i'm with her it reminds me of that night, and now she's lost all efforts to try and be kind to me. she completely ignores me. and i even started getting over it. but now she makes me feel horrible for needing a break. like i did something unforgivable to her."

"she was the person that didn't make me feel judged."

that line struck chaewon hard.

"even you, who i'm trying to open up to, i still secretly feel you're judging me. i'm regretting every word coming out of my mouth because you could use this against me."

what the fuck happened to her growing up.

"i'm incredibly sorry that's how you feel."

"can you just be a wall that hears me but doesn't say anything."