𝐈𝐃𝐎𝐋𝐈𝐙𝐄 (yandere x reader)

➢ CHAPTER SIXTEEN

this chapter contains very serious, very emotional scenes. including themes of suicide. there will be a summary at the end of the chapter, written in bold. if you feel these topics are too triggering, please feel free to skip to the end and read that.

i love you all. stay safe.

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SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 9, 1996

(Y/N) stumbled through the streets. It was still daylight out. Usually it was dark by the time she left work, but she wasn't even allowed to finish her shift. She just left.

She tried to think of a good plan, but every time she started, she felt this weight on her chest. She could barely breathe. She knew she could get another job, but everything just felt so... impossible. (Y/N) didn't even know if she had a place to stay tonight. And now she'd been fired? She was completely screwed.

But the tears wouldn't come. Her whole body felt like collapsing, but she kept walking. She wished she could just cry, get all the emotions out so she could be done with them. But her awareness of the world was distant and cloudy.

She missed Lev. Her life had never been perfect, or even very good, but... he had this way of making her feel weightless. Like, maybe her problems weren't so serious. Maybe everything would be okay. He was such a wonderful distraction. And he always made her feel so loved.

Now she just felt empty.

Before she knew it, (Y/N) was standing in front of her apartment complex. She was still unsure if going in was a good idea. Her mom might react badly, scream and slap her across the face── it wouldn't be the first time── but with how fast and severely her moods changed, it was just as likely that she'd had a change of heart by now and would let her in.

Risk getting hit or risk being homeless. Those seemed to be her only options.

Ah, well, bruises heal. Starving to death or getting killed out on the streets doesn't.

She knocked on the door── no answer. But when she twisted the knob, it came open. It had been left unlocked. Hesitantly, (Y/N) walked through the doorway. (E/C) eyes looked around. The apartment was cleaner than usual. No signs of alcohol or some extravagant new project brought on by her mother's mania. It looked... normal.

"Mom...?" (Y/N) called out after a moment.

She heard a gasp, followed by the sounds of rapid footsteps. Her mom quickly emerged from the hallway, and ran up to her. "(Y/N)!" She practically screamed. In great contrast to the newly clean apartment, her mother looked a mess. Her hair was messy and greasy, her clothes wrinkled, and the dark bags under her eyes gave away her lack of sleep. She looked terrible. She threw her arms around her daughter───  and she smelled terrible, too.

"Oh, God, (Y/N)! I'm so sorry!" She pulled her closer, buried her head into (Y/N)'s shoulder. "I──  You know I didn't mean all those terrible things I said, right? I love you so much, baby, I'm so sorry."

(Y/N) patted her back soothingly. "It's okay, Mom," she said.

"I mean, to kick you out like that──  Who knows what could've happened to you and I──  I don't know how I can possibly make it up to you! God, I just──  I just──" (Y/N) felt her shoulder dampen, as her mom began weeping. "I just feel so terrible."

"It's okay, Mom," (Y/N) said again. She'd been through this a thousand times by now, and knew what she said didn't matter so much as that she was there.