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Chapter: 19

"Why do you think he did that?" I asked Reid. He held me and helped me up to the bed. "I think he's just hurt and miss Rose a lot," he spoke while running his hands through his hair.

"He told me he wanted me as his future, but that's never gonna work if he thinks about that." Reid looked at you for a while with a sad face.

"I'm almost done to get the information I need. Just wait, because after he knows the information he will change." I wiped away my tears.

I really hope he changes after the information.

"What kind of information are you talking about?" I asked being curious.

"You will know, but I can't tell you. I'm one step ahead, and when I get that information I will tell you and Juan everything." He gave me a smile and placed a kiss on my forehead.

It was silent for a minute before Reid spoke again, "But remember Valerie, Juan loves you. Rose was his childhood love, but you're his adult love. There's a difference so don't think he doesn't love you," I wanted to say something but I let Reid finish.

"He loves you that's why he's so attached to you," he said, "He never kissed someone on the neck before. He never felt so good after sex or happy during. He does love you. Give him some time. And he will apologize for what he did! And last but not least, I have never seen him so happy after such a long time. You're his happiness."

My heart was beating faster. I don't know what to believe. I want to believe that Juan loves me, but I feel like he doesn't.

I'm sure he loves me, but it's not me he loves. He loves the Rose version of me.

Whenever he sees me, he doesn't see me. He sees Rose. That's why he's so happy around me and feels so good.

He will never be happy for me and seeing my face, but Rose's. It hurts, of course. Maybe I just need to give him some time.

I don't want to be with him if he sees Rose in me. I won't feel loved, I will feel used. Used by my own love. The person I love.

I will always love him no matter what. Even though he sees Rose in me. My love for him will never die and I will continue to love him, even though he will hurt me.

I will let him hurt me if I can be with him. If I can feel and touch him in so many different ways. I would do anything to just have him near me.

I have never loved someone like I love him, Juan. He makes me so happy just by looking at him.

That's why I love him. Not for looks, but the way he is and his personality.

I love you, Juan. I love you so very much. Hurt me, kill me, hate me but my love for you will never change. Even if Rose comes back or you hate me.

I can't even imagine to hate you for you. I will always love you in every conditions. I love you, Juan.

I hope we can have a chance so I can share the love I want to give you, because you deserve it.

"I'm not his happiness." Reid sighed, "let me tell you why."

He rubbed his face hand nodded.

"He's happy because he sees Rose in me. He doesn't love me for me. But me for Rose. He loves to be with me because he sees Rose in me. You see, everything is about Rose. Nothings about me. He doesn't love me."

Reid took my hand.

"I know why he sees Rose in you. There's more than one reason," he gave me a smile. "You will know why after a while. I don't need to tell you why. You'll find it out yourself soon."