In The Dark (Frerard) ✔

Chapter 17

Gerard's POV

I sat near the cliff a ways away from the creek and hidden by the bushes. The view in the afternoon seemed to be entrancing. Humming a little as I felt the song in my mind come from my mouth. "Long ago, and oh so far away, I fell in love with you, before the second show," I sang slowly, messing with some leaves that happened to be beneath me. The words seemed to remind me of a certain someone. "Your guitar, it sounds so sweet and clear. But you're not really here, it's just the radio," I sang, my eyes feeling a little water come to the edge of my eyes as I sang.

It reminded me of not being able to see Frank, realizing that a week and a half wasn't much to live out until we were supposed to go home. Sure, the two of us were pretty close, but it doesn't mean it was a promise. It's not like he thought of me as I thought of him. "Don't you remember you told me you loved me, baby,
You said you'd be coming back this way again baby," I sang once more, picturing Frank as I smiled. Except I wasn't smiling for long when I realized the question that had been nagging at my brain. What if Frank got a girlfriend?

"Shit-" I whispered, crushing a leaf in my hands as I thought about it even more. What if he got a girlfriend and suddenly didn't want to hang out with me? He wouldn't like me, I knew that much and had made peace with it a little, but not even being able to talk to him made my brain spin. There was a rustling of leaves behind me, a few footsteps, and then a familiar voice that pulled me from my thoughts. "There you are! I've been looking for you, Gee," Frank exclaimed, sitting beside me and smiling wide as he saw my face. I didn't realize it, but I was smiling with him, and I don't remember smiling. I guess it's a reaction that I'd been used to for it to come without hesitation.

Frank looked at the cliff, making it apparent that he was keeping his distance from the edge now, which made me chuckle a little bit."That was some beautiful singing by the way... You being out here and all, I'm sure you didn't want anyone to hear you, but I thought it was soothing," Frank complimented, looking out to where I had just been gazing moments before. "Well, thank you. It's good to see you up and walking again," I told him, looking at his ankle and seeing the bandage that had since been changed. He looked down, nodding and laughing a little.

"Yeah? Still limping like I got fucked, but shit, it feels better than just laying in bed and getting piggybacked to mealtimes. But thank you for that, I appreciate it," Frank told me, though the first part of that sentence was quite ajarring, my face hot and likely a deep red even though I attempted to cool them down. "Y-you're welcome, I didn't mind carrying you everywhere. It was quite a fun thing that I got to be a part of. Even though you were injured and that wasn't fun," I rambled, chuckling awkwardly and tossing my head back as I let out a deep sigh. I looked at the leaves, letting my mind spiral and wander freely. I saw a bird just passing through, disappearing after a while.

Birds are so carefree, being able to love easily. All they have to do is present a nest and then boom! They mate, have kids, and live happily. Or that's what I assumed happened, I didn't know much about the bird life cycle. But I did know it would have been easier to be a bird. Imagine you were a bird and you had a fear of heights. It would suck, keeping low to the ground, probably closer to predators. Maybe it would stunt the learning considering that the bird wouldn't just be thrown out of the nest and then suddenly fly.

"What are you thinking about?" Frank asked, making me snap out of my thoughts and sit up a bit. My eyes were fairly dry, wiping them a bit and then blinking. "Just thinking of the what if a bird was scared of heights," I told him, looking over and seeing him fiddling with the frayed end of the bandaging. I guess it was a weird thing to think of, seeing a bird off in the distance of the forest. "Well, I love your imagination. I believe it would be a learning curve though," Frank told me, chuckling a little bit as he smiled. I nodded, chuckling a little bit as I remembered a jingle in my head.

"Always was called very creative when I was a kid, even with songs I came with when I was young that I sing to remember where I was going on my first walk to school by myself. It was to the tune of Cupid Shuffle," I admitted, remembering how it was easier to get home and distract me from the anxiety of being kidnapped. Though I was quite a chubby kid, it wasn't impossible to pick me up because of my stature. I would have thought that Frank, given the chance of how ridiculous it was, would have made fun of me for it.

"Well hey, that's just using resources that you had at the time, even if it was to the tune of Cupid Shuffle," Frank reassured me, propping his legs up a little to lean forward a bit, surprisingly without putting pressure on his ankle. I smiled, not quite being used to the compliments, but it was seemingly nice to receive them. Thinking back to my original thought, I would have to stuff these feelings away if Frank got a girlfriend. Or even a boyfriend. I couldn't pick which would be more painful to think about. I shrugged it off, having to settle for being a good friend, and staying with him through it all. That's what I'd settle for, just for him. For this beautiful boy.