Love Again ✔

4. Tell Me What To Do

Rose (Ella):

"Let's start easy then. What's your favorite color?" He smiles again and I want to tell him that his smile is really beautiful but I shouldn't because I don't want to send the wrong message or signal.

"White." I smile but quickly drop it when I notice the surprise back on his face. Everything seems to surprise this man. "What? You d-don't like it? It's really b-beautiful. Peaceful."

He blinks his surprise away before grinning. "Actually white is my favorite color too."

It's my turn to be surprised now. I wouldn't have guessed. "Really?"

He chuckles, nodding his head and I watch his black hair bounce a little at the top of his head. It looks adorably shiny and really soft. I like it. "Really. Did you assume it was black or grey or something dark like that?"

"No, I don't assume a-anything anymore." I quickly assure him, my heart picking up its pace stupidly. "I'll only b-believe what you tell me. I p-promise."

His frown his back and I swallow before looking down at my hands on my lap. The sound of a plate being placed in front of Theo makes me jump in my seat and I watch as our waitress snaps her head in my direction.

"I'm so sorry I startled you, darlin'. Apologies." She smiles sympatheticly at me and I give her a small one in return.

"It's all g-good." I shrug and secretly eye the burger she placed opposite from me. Yes, it's as delicious as it sounded.

"There you go, hun." She places my coke and fries in front of me. "If you need anythin' else just holler."

I love the confidence she walks around with. It's one of the things I miss the most about myself. Being that confident. That full of life. I wish her confidence never gets slipped away from her.

"It's your turn, Ella." Theo breaks through the sad thoughts that were about to consume my head and I'm glad he does so.

I take a moment to think. "Tell me a s-secret about y-you no one knows. Or o-only a few people do."

He stares at me for a whole minute and I'm ashamed to admit that I couldn't break this intense eye contact no matter how hard I wanted to. Despite knowing that his enchanting eyes are what I should avoid the most, they seem to have a power over me that I can't shake. His words, however, send my heart into a frenzy. "I'm in love with the most beautiful girl on this earth."

Oh. I did not see that coming. That's a good thing. Isn't it? That means he'd never expect anything of me. That means I'd never misread any gestures or signs from him. That's good. I'm happy for him. "But why is that a s-secret?"

He winces as if in pain as he looks at me intently before sighing. "Because she's not ready for my love yet."

I freeze.

"But it's okay." He smiles brightly, his face filled with childish, dangerous hope, and I feel the tears filling my eyes at the speed of light. "I'll wait for as long as she needs me to."

I want him to stop talking. I need him to stop talking. I need the memories to go back, to hide again.

"I'll be patient for her, no matter how long it takes." He sounds so wistful, his words too familiar, that my heart breaks all over again.

No.

Standing up abruptly, I look around us as my tears fall down my cheeks. Finding the bathroom sign at the other corner of the diner, I hurriedly make my way over, ignoring my name as Theo calls after me.

I need to have a minute to breathe. To hide. To calm down.

I need to have a minute so whoever is up there can hear me hoping, praying, begging with every peice of my broken heart, that Theo has a better ending than the one I'm still stuck in.