After taste (BxB) (OMEGAVERSE) (BOYSLOVE) MPREG

Thirteen.

Gulong gulo na yung utak ko. I stayed in my room for a day, didn't even eat and all. I locked it after I took all the keys. What do I do? What should I do? Kung ako lang okay lang sa akin pero pano naman mga anak ko. It scarred them. Seeing their father kissed someone else and not me. My heart broke for them they're still young to be feeling this. To have this as a trauma. I hate Heegan but I hated myself more if I wasn't so in love with Heegan we weren't going to be in this situation in the first place. Sana nag isip na lang kami ng ibang paraan para sa mga bata. Bakit kasi umaasa pa ako? Feeling ko naman porket apat anak namin mamahalin niya na ako? Si Kaori nga na ang tagal na nafall out of love pa siya. 

"Rhythm Lane open the goddamn door!" He bangs at the door. He's been constantly hovering at the door. Bakit di mo sirain? Bahay mo naman ito. I want to just leave all of this and leave with my kids but I know sa pinto palang di na kami makakalabas.

But I do not want to stay here anymore, I will talk to the kids. I can't be with Heegan anymore. Ikamamatay ko na talaga. So I opened the door and ignored him pumunta ako ng banyo at naligo.

I've decided to leave. I will let the kids choose pwede naman sakanya mga bata ng ilang araw tapos uwi sa akin. Salitan kami. But I'm not marrying him anymore. I'm already ruined by loving him, I don't know if I can take it anymore.

When I was done I saw him sitting sa gilid ng bed. I took out my suitcase and put some of my things konti lang naman ang dinala ko. I still have our old pad. I didn't sell it. That's where we live for years and my father's memory is in there.

"What are you doing?"

Bulag ka di mo nakikita? Pero di ko siya inimik. Lagay lang ako ng lagay. Lumapit siya sa akin at pinigilan yung kamay ko. I slapped his hand. "Don't fucking touch me! I'm leaving..."

He froze. "N-no... No you're not. I won't let you." Madiin niyang wika sa akin.

I scoffed almost rolled my eyes. I just opted to bitterly smile. "Oh yeah? Watch me."

"Stop this, Rhythm..."

I glared at him. "I am leaving, you do not own me. Ama ka lang ng mga bata but you--you don't own me. The kids will stay if you want. I will just visit them. They'd understand, they're smart. I need this, Svern."

He throws my suitcase it crashed and everything in it. I was shocked and I was too stunned to stop him.

"You're not fucking leaving!"

"Bakit?! Hindi mo naman ako mahal! Just let me do this! Ayoko na! Just stop! Tama na! Ayoko na, pagod na pagod na pagod na ako... Please... Ayoko na..." Pagmamakaawa ko sakaniya. Tuluyan nang tumulo yung luha ko. Napaupo na lang ako sa sahig pakiramdam ko nauubos na talaga ako. He's sucking all of me until I am almost gone. I love Heegan, I swear with all of me. That's why it took me this long to really get tired of him, of all of this. Everything I knew and do was all because of him, because I was so fucking madly in love with him that I loose sight of what or who I was before him.

Nakita kong pumungay ang mga mata niya. "Just... That kiss I didn't mean it, I pushed him! I was just shocked that's why I--"

I nod. Pagod na ako. "Okay. Aalis parin ako." Garalgal na sabi ko sakaniya. Pagod na yung utak ko iproseso lahat. I feel so drained and all. I never knew loving hurt this bad.

Umiling siya. "No please, Rhythm. Ayusin natin to. Let's fix this for the kids."

I shook my head. I laughed sarcastically. "Yeah for the kids and the only reason you're stopping me is because of the kids. You know they wouldn't like you without me right? I'll just... I will talk to them but as for me-- L-let's just stop this. Wag mo na akong idamay kung magulo ang utak mo. I'm tired, Svern. If you do not want me to kill myself you will let me leave." Natigilan siya sa sinabi ko. Desperado na ako. Gusto ko na lang umalis.

"Do you really hate me that much? I didn't mean to do that... I didn't."

I wiped my tears. Still sobbing. Took my suitcase and put all my things back buti nga matibay e. "Okay. Let's just say okay. I know you don't love me, it's fine. Sanay na ako... Just--just treat the kids good. I'm sorry Svern, you cancel the wedding and apologize to everyone since it's your fault..."

"Papa I want to come..." Morrigan pleads. I wanted to take them too but for now I can't they have to see their father and be with him to see that he really loves them. Inayos ko yung buhok niya.

"Oh, love... You will stay here first may pasok pa kayo and you know daddy's trying to fix everything. I will get you every weekends okay? Please understand my love. I'm sorry..." I kissed her head. She was sobbing na, Keegan said he will take care of his siblings. Iiwan ko muna din sa Mom at Molly dito. Ako lang muna talaga yung aalis. I needed this because if not I feel like I'll go crazy.

"Your dad loves you okay? All 5 of you, including Saint okay? Never think for a second that he doesn't... Sometimes adult to things unintentionally okay? Please Morrigan? Give him a chance. I will facetime always okay? You know Papa needs this right? Keegan?"

I hugged Keegan."I'm sorry anak. I'm not leaving you permanently, I just need time to think and all. You understand kuya diba?" I held his hand and kissed it.

"I know Papa. Don't worry nothing could ever change the love we had for you po. We know how much you loved and did everything for us and also Tito Kelly..."

He still tried stopping me but I didn't listen. I told Kelly I'll go in my condo and he said he will visit. I need him even when I know he's going through phase. I didn't even look back at Heegan. I didn't want to hate him more than I love him. But I guess when you're too tired of everything your body will reject it for you. I got sick when I got home.