A Pearl Of Wisdom (#Wattys2016)

Chapter 1: Oh Brother!

The feeling of sand between my toes is so satisfying, I push my feet downwards until they are completely covered. I hear footsteps behind me and a gentle hand on my shoulder.

"He didn't mean it Anise, he was just in a bad mood. "He will get over it quickly and things will get back to normal".

"I am sick of normal, I sometimes feel like there is nothing I can do to get his approval." I mean he has four sons why would I need to be a fifth."

Wren sighs with a heavy sounding plop as he lands down next to me. "It is not that he wants you to be another son, it is just that he doesn't know how to relate and treat a daughter. You just were in the middle of all these boys and doesn't realize that you feel things differently from himself."

" I know I can't blame him, I mean I hardly can even recognize myself as a girl sometimes. I mean I am not the prettiest among the girls. I am hardy and strong and pretty much act like another son, but it is not like I don't want to be treated like a girl" I say.

Wren is one of my best friends, he is the brother most close to me in age since we are only 13 months apart. I am 19, and he has just turned 20. We have always been close and I go to him with all my secrets and he does the same.

"Okay I am getting up and going back, and I will get on with my day and probably avoid talking to Dad until I feel better." I pat myself off and lend a hand to Wren. He grabs my hand and nods his head in agreement.

We walk back to the house enjoying the comfortable silence between each other and I feel a wave of a nostalgia, I feel like I should cherish this moment.

"Anise" Wren says suddenly.

I turn to look at him.

"Would it be bad if I told you that I think I like someone?"

"What? this is new, who are you talking about?" I grabbed his arm to look him in the eyes.

"There is currently no one but I was just thinking what would happen if one of us starting dating somebody and then got married?"

I clutch my chest "You scared me I really thought you were going to leave me alone with the family!", "All I can say I do not want to think about it, but I really think it will be hard on me because I know I won't be able to be as close to you as I am now."

By now we had reached the front door and commotion was happening inside, Bay comes crashing through the door with toast in his mouth running out of the house. He waves hello and runs out, obviously trying to get out of chores this morning and just heading to school.

"I think we should just leave him be", I say.

"Yeah lets go get some breakfast and then get to work before the sun gets too hot."

We gather with the rest of the family and start breakfast. Hollis is discussing the orchard with Father. He really is the responsible one out of all of us kids. I am really surprised that he has not gotten married since he is already 23. Heath is the second oldest and he could also be a candidate for marriage since he is 21, but not many girls in our village love the quiet introspective guy. Of course my other brother Bay he is the youngest coming in at 16 is not ready for marriage yet, but I'm pretty sure he has like 3 girlfriends. I would not be surprised if he would get married before all of us.

"Anise do you want to stay in and help me with the house chores this morning instead of working in the orchard" my mother asks.

"No, Mom I am fine, I do not mind working outside today" I reply. That is my mom, so considerate, the only reason she asked was because I got into a fight with my Dad today and knows I need some distance. It was not even a big deal I just sometimes get tired of being treated like a boy. Just because I am not a girly girl does not mean that I do not being appreciated and told that I am still beautiful, at least in my own way. I have never been the favorite among boys since I am not girly they do not see me as a girl. Since I am shy and have so many brothers they also seemed to avoid me. Luckily, Wren was close to my age in school and would hang out with me lots and would include me with his friends.

I always had a feeling that something didn't fit, like I didn't fit in even among my family. I love each and everyone one of them deeply and dearly, yet I always found myself longing for something even unknown to myself. Almost the sense that I was forgetting something and every once in a while; I would feel startled like I had missed something but I could never pinpoint what it was.