8 Makes 1 Family

Chapter 19

Hongjoong's POV

The minute I woke up, memories of what happened yesterday resurfaced and I held back a groan. What I did was stupid, but I felt that I needed to do it. The thing that made it worse was the fact that the boys saw me in that state. I don't want them thinking any less of me, but I can't change the fact that I got drunk and they saw me. They'll probably think I'm incompetent, and shouldn't be in charge of the Sector anymore. I can't blame them though, I did do a stupid thing. My thoughts were cut off as I felt something move against my side and my eyes snapped open. I glanced down to see that San was cuddled up tightly to my side, his arms around my chest and one of his legs thrown over my waist. I was looked around to see that we were in the loungeroom which confused me. Didn't they put me in bed after my little episode? Why wouldn't they do that? I glanced around and saw that all the boys were laying asleep, piled up on mattresses they must've dragged into the loungeroom. Not only was San tucked into my side, but Wooyoung was also cuddled up to my other side, his head resting on my chest and his hand holding San's. I shifted slightly, trying to move out of their holds without waking up, but that failed when San stirred and tightened his hold around me. He moved his head up and buried it into my neck, his breath hitting it softly. He doesn't know it's me. He wouldn't be so happy with cuddling me if he realised who he was cuddling. I desperately tried to hold back tears as I squirmed and tried to move without waking the two boys on me. I don't want to see their disappointed faces, I don't want them to tell me I'm pathetic. I'll just get up, pack a few things and ask Youngjay to give me a single room that I can stay in until they find a new place for me. I love them with all my heart, but I've shown them weakness, something that isn't fit for a leader. After a bit more of a struggle, I finally managed to slip myself out of Wooyoung and San's grasp without waking either of them. I went to the front of the room before pausing and turning to look at them, my boys.

They were all cuddled up on the floor of the loungeroom, sleeping soundly. How could they be sleeping so soundly? And when they were next to me? The tears slowly begun to fall down my face, and I covered my mouth with my hand to hold back sobs. I don't want to wake them up. They don't need to see me again. Everyone's just going to leave me anyway. Everyone I love get's hurt, so it's only right I leave now.

I wiped my eyes quickly and walked over to my room. I grabbed a backpack and hurriedly piled some clothes into it. I pulled my phone from my pocket and placed it down on the bedside table. Seonghwa can have it, he'll probably be the new leader. I went over to my bedside table and picked up the photo frame that I had there. It was a photo I had taken about a year ago, with all of the boys together and hugging. It doesn't have Yeosang, but it's a beautiful memory. I placed into my backpack and zipped it up. That's all I need now. I can go and leave the boys, let them live, like my parents couldn't.

"Hyung? What're you doing?" I froze at the gentle voice, the grip on my bag faltering as it slipped back to the bed. I spun around quickly to see Yeosang standing in the doorway, his hair tousled as he rubbed his eyes with his fists.

"Um, nothing. Go back to bed Sangie," I told him quickly. Yeosang won't understand as much as the other's. He's not in as much danger because even though I love him, he doesn't love me, I'm merely a friend of his.

"Why're you packing a bag? Are you going somewhere," he asked me.

"Just for a walk," I said quickly, reaching my hand back to grasp my bag.

"But why do you need a bag for that," he asked sleepily, walking closer. Tears welled up in my eyes, but I willed them back, blinking quickly so I wouldn't shed them.

"Just for some snacks and stuff," I lied. His eyebrows furrowed and he seemed to be pondering for a few seconds.

"Hyung, are you leaving," he asked quietly, lifting his head to look up at me with wide, innocent eyes.