Miles apart (Man × Man) ✔

14) i g n o r e d

Miles found it impossible to concentrate at work, when all he wanted to do was stare at the screen and daydream. He was reluctant to admit it, even to himself, but he was missing Ash. Not just the thrill of his touches, the intoxicating taste of his kisses, not even the sound of his voice. Just to have him around would have been enough a reason to a face-splitting smile.

When Miles found out Ash was coming to the sushi gathering as well, he jumped up from his office seat and celebrated the news with a happy dance around the office. Luckily no one was there to see him, as far as he knew. His and Ash’s thing was still too fragile to talk about, and if Benjamin, Judith or Jeremy Preston had been there to witness his reaction to the text, questions would have followed.

What Miles and Ash had was so undefined, that Miles wasn't even sure what to call it. A courtship? A fling? Friends with benefits? Strangers with benefits? They needed to have a talk about it, preferably before Miles got ahead of himself and called it something it was never going to be for Ash.

When Miles joined the others in front of the restaurant, he was feeling hopeful. He and Ash had left things on a positive note, and he wished Ash was as happy to see him as he was to see Ash. When Ash slouched to them, that hope already started to falter. He stopped next to Miles, hands stuffed deep in his pockets and a rain cloud hanging above his head.

"Hi." Miles mouthed, his voice getting lost somewhere in the process, and gave Ash a tentative smile. Ash just nodded and locked his gaze with Miles'. The look in his eyes was unreadable, giving away nothing, but the way he hunched his shoulders.. The way the corners of his mouth were pulled down slightly. Was something bothering him? And could that something be Miles?

Just give me a smile, so that I can stop worrying all the time, Miles wanted to whisper in his ear. He didn't. He couldn’t possibly have asked something like that from Ash, so instead he kept fidgeting and torturing himself with all his negative thoughts.

"Sorry, I'm late." Judith greeted them and leaned closer to give Benjamin a kiss on the cheek. She was wearing high heels and Miles felt like she was towering five feet above him when she turned to give him a brief half-hug. "So, is everyone here? Where's Eye ca.. Eli?"

"Yeah, exactly." Steven, a beanpole guy who had a remarkably handsome face and a various collection of odd, flamboyant clothes, looked around. "Anyone heard from Eli?"

It was followed by Benjamin calling Eli, who didn't answer, and a debate of whether or not they should wait for him. It seemed like the majority of them were starving, so they decided to go ahead and order. Miles, on the other hand, was too nervous to even think of eating. He kept stealing glances at Ash, who avoided his gaze while taking the seat opposite him.

They ordered a broad variety of sushi, nigiri and sashimi, making sure there would be something for everyone, and three bottles of wine. Miles was relieved to find nigiris topped with something yellow, probably egg, and something brown, apparently tofu, because just the thought of raw fish made him gag.

His stomach was still in tight knots, but at least he could gulp down the wine effortlessly. Eventually, after a glass of wine and a light conversation with Shirley and Dam-Bi, he could feel the knots loosening enough for him to breathe again.

By the time Eli arrived, fashionably late and subtly scolded by Judith, Miles let himself believe Ash wasn't acting the way he did because of him. After all, he was certain he hadn't done anything to piss him off this time.

Growing up with a father, who had a tendency to blow up over trifling matters, had taught Miles to pay attention to his surroundings, especially when it came to people. He had learned to notice the ticks in their voices, the sharp intakes of breath and the emotions flashing in their eyes. Even the smallest nuances weren't lost to him, because danger was hidden behind every gesture and word.