fountainhead

cross my mind - to follow or not to follow

(because this book will have everything to do with profiles, i think it is fitting to mention an important role of readers and writers, i.e. following members on this site or being followed by them, for what will we be without each other?)

i think it necessary to occasionally de-follow and to be de-followed. one should not take it personally (you will know the difference between a spiteful removal and one that makes sense to both parties and in both cases one should, if you use your commonsense, be fine with it). it happens that the more acquainted one becomes with this site, shifts occur, requirements and perspectives change and what one thought one liked at some point is not at all what one wants or likes later on. and honestly, who can deal with the feed clog on the news feeds or the e-mails (imagine how many truly unnecessary mails there probably are in your inbox daily) especially if they are from readers who NEVER read you, or people you thought had something in common with you, but you realize later, clearly do not? in the six months that i have been on this site, i have had two de-following sessions of my own; this is why i am writing this. i want folks to know that it honestly is nothing personal or petty; it is a practical consideration. hopefully it should always be just that. at this point i am very comfortable and feel quite airy about my lists and most of the people on them; i can honestly say that i have respect for their writing and for how their minds work. some of us even become friends; we are human and as it is in our day to day lives, we just take to certain individuals more easily than to others (i never planned to forge friendships!). one gets to know your friends' friends too and even though one does not get too cosy with them, one is somehow always aware and in a way, considerate of them. it's like neighbours or family, except you sort of get to choose. (except for the enthusiastic aimless and confused followers!) of course i would love to meet many other compelling members of this site, but to follow them i need to keep the number of people i follow, manageable. de-following, i think, is the ideal solution. it is currently the case that after you have added a certain number, you cannot add more; keeping the list trim, will sort out this problem. i'm fond of my followers as well as the writers/readers that i follow. i love reading their stories and i hope they like reading mine. i am excited when i see so-and-so has posted something new to read; it's like a mystery gift; you never know what delights you may unwrap.

which brings me to the my next thought. i chose to follow certain writers; i will read their stories as much as i can. i like their writing and it's why i followed them in the first place. when a complete stranger reads and leaves a comment, i am polite and i will probably visit their page too. once at least. if i like their writing, of course i'll visit them regularly, if i don't, i won't. and the same goes for people who fan me. should i fan back, of course there's a shift again.

it is a huge pity that one cannot un-fan oneself from a follower's list. this possibility should seriously be looked into. so many new readers and writers follow every reader they can click on, quite indiscriminately and one should have the choice of removing oneself from that list of the people who cannot tell their ears from their elbows. (perhaps one could have the choice of informing the person who follows, that one will be removing oneself; it gives him/her the option of entering into a discussion about it if they would like that) I'm thinking how easy i can un-follow someone from my list , why on earth can i not un-follow myself as easily from theirs?! it makes no sense at all.

(months later)

i have found a way that could suit me very well in removing myself from someone's follow list. i have yet to take the time to actually sit and do this. (let me say now that we all know some people follow indiscriminately for whatever reason. and maybe it doesn't really matter, but sometimes it clogs the newsfeed plus the person who has followed me is not interested in anything but being followed too and i know i am never going to be able to manage all the reading i need to do or i really am not interested in a story about the devil's spawn or one direction's spawn or anyone's spawn, for that matter(or or or or or) and there's no way i'll read it. or one just never sees or hears anything of them ever again.) i can go to their page, click the ignore button and then immediately after, i undo 'ignore'. they will not reappear on my page's 'followed by' profile pics when i undo 'ignore'. that member will probably not even notice that i did this. i know because i have been de-followed a few times and i didn't know who it was and would scarcely be able to pick up on it if i tried. if they do notice, maybe they will realise that their follow of me was not really to their advantage and definitely not to mine and that this is my nice way of detangling myself from wp overflow in general. should they re-follow, i'd be so surprised, i would probably just let them...there is a lot to be said for perseverence and i admire spirit.