𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐋𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒; 𝑻.𝑮𝑰𝒀𝑼𝑼

t h i r t y - f i v e

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you stood alone in the house, unsure of what to do. you had woken up a few minutes ago to use the restroom, which you did. but you were still half asleep as you left the room to go. it was only when you had returned did you notice the empty space where ayumu should have been in.

where did he go?

you searched the whole house for him, but to no avail. then you realised that hikari wasn't here either. you didn't like the idea that ayumu was out alone somewhere with hikari in the middle of the night. the crow that used to work with your father, chose to stay with you even after the mans' passing. he was a great companion, but unfortunately you couldn't trust him.

being your fathers' crow, hikari followed him everywhere, knew where he was all the time and what he does. you can even say he has spent more time with your father than you ever did.

which meant he knew how your dad died and what happened to him that night. it was four years ago, when you were sixteen. you were at home with your mother, who was busy trying to get ayumu to sleep. it was almost four in the morning and your two year old brother was wide awake, crying about god knows what.

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"gosh, he won't stop crying," your mom complained from the kitchen. "[y/n], i'm taking him to the bedroom, could you help me wash up the rest of the dishes?"

she didn't give you a chance to reply before she disappeared into the bedroom, leaving you alone. you got up from the couch in the living room and made your way to the kitchen to wash the remaining dishes.

you felt bad for your mother. she was a very fragile woman with her emotions everywhere. she hides whenever she's stressed or upset, something ayumu had picked up from her. she wasn't a terrible mother, you knew she was trying her best and you were grateful for that. but this house was full of secrets, everyone was hiding something from one another.

and your mother unfortunately was quite gullible. your father on the other hand was a great liar, or so he thought. your father was a busy man, of course, being a pillar isn't an easy job and you respected him for it.

it was eight months ago, on your fathers' birthday. the four of you went out together for dinner. every thing was fine, until a certain friend of his showed up. your father claimed that the man was a friend of his, but you could tell that that wasn't the case. the rest of the dinner was tense.

your fathers' "friend" was... interesting to say the least. he was very friendly, talked a lot, laughed a lot. maybe a little too much. but something about him was off. even your mother felt the same. when his "friend" left, your mother immediately told your father to stay away from that man.

your father agreed, saying that he had met that man while on a mission somewhere. and he promised to never meet up with him ever again.

lies.

that very same night when everyone was asleep, your father had snuck out of the house to find the man he promised to never see.

it went on for eight months. you never told your mother anything, she was already stressed with having to take care of ayumu. you didn't want to make her feel any worse.

there was knocking on the window, you stopped what you were doing, dried your hands and went to check. there was hikari on the other side of the glass. it was dark. you opened the window, holding your arm up to allow hikari to perch on your wrist. you didn't notice, until you felt it.

warm red liquid. blood. you immediately thought hikari was injured, running to the bathroom to clean him up. "what happened? where's dad? are you okay? is he okay?"

hikari stayed silent as you washed the blood off his feathers. "there's no wound," you stated. "hikari, where's my father?"

you didn't get an answer.

you stayed up the rest of the night, until the sun came up. your mom was still asleep in the room with ayumu when someone knocked on the front door.

you pushed the door open, hoping it was your father on the other side. you were met with nothing. confused, you looked around your surroundings, immediately regretting it.

a piece of clothing was folded and placed by the front door. you picked it up, knowing full well that it belonged to your father. as you unfold the piece of clothing, you felt your heart sink.

blood, blood, blood. it was fresh too. staining your hands as you held onto the torn haori.

they never found his body. everyone kept telling you that he wasn't dead, not until his body is found, to keep your hopes up, that'll he'll come back. he's fine. he's alive. you wanted to believe it all. but you've been observing hikari for the pass few days. you've never seen him so upset before. he barely ate anything and slept throughout the days and nights. you knew just by his mannerisms, that your father won't be returning.

your mother was devastated. ayumu, not so much, he was too young to understand what was going on.

days, months, years passed. from hoping he was still alive to assuming he was dead. a funeral was held for him. you didn't go. neither did your mother.

you spent everyday thinking, trying to figure out what happened that night. you knew that hikari knew, you had asked him a few times but he refused to answer and would change the subject.

you knew who killed your father. or you'd like to think you do. it was him. that strange man your father claimed to be friends with. the one who joined you for dinner on the night of your fathers' birthday.

how could you even forget. that man had such captivating appearances. he was tall with long silver-white hair. rainbow coloured eyes. it took you a while but you realised why you felt uncomfortable at that time. that man was a demon. you didn't notice it back then, but you had a feeling.

that demon was the one who killed your father. you wished you knew more about their relationship but you don't. 

you wondered if your mother ever knew. she was gullible, but she wasn't stupid. you can't say the same for your father. what was he even thinking? befriending a demon. especially when he was a pillar. hikari knew everything but refuses to tell you. a promise he made to your father, he says.

you never liked promises. your father had promised he would never meet up with that demon again and yet he did. your mother who promised she would be  here to look out for ayumu until he was old enough to help you out with your daily activities. and then you made her a promise to take care of ayumu.

you didn't think that was possible anymore.

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a knock on the front door pulled you out of your thoughts. you jumped up from the couch, rushing to open it. is it ayumu? hikari must have found him and brought him back. or maybe it's giyuu? shinobu?

"oh."