Can I Be Your Mrs?

19: The Body

The moment he felt her hands into his hair, Yazeed knew he had to slow himself down unless he wanted something to happen, which he was sure they would both regret later. He eased off, and she slackened on him as if she was butter and him the fire that had successfully melted her with his lips. He broke apart from his lips, and thankfully, she had calmed down now. She wasn't crying nor did her body trembled. She looked calm, shy, and peaceful altogether. She just stood there, close to him as she fixed her hands now that were on her laps. He didn't know how he found it in him to smile, but he did. Because he had realized the calm and don't forget, shy Jalilah will be the most beautiful thing he could ever see.

They stood there in silence for minutes until she felt the silence slowly trying to burst her thumping heart. It felt like a needle getting close to a filled balloon. She couldn't take it anymore, she lifted her face and found that he was just staring at her. Not with the disgust, she had seen before, the hatred, the angry Yazeed she began to be afraid of, but he was looking at her with an expression she couldn't fathom. There was a certain calmness in him that successfully washed away the remaining grief his kiss hadn't washed away. Oh my amazing god! No, she wouldn't think about this now. She quickly took her eyes off and to her surprise, Yazeed pulled her to himself once again.

She didn't budge when he placed her head on his shoulder and said nothing, she had no words either. They stood there in silence, only the racing beats of their hearts until he found it in him to speak, the time he felt he could speak without any fear of what he would say to her. "You'll be fine, okay?" He whispered, and just a like a baby, Jalilah nodded her head and closed her eyes. She wanted to stay like this forever. Yes, she knew he was the cause of her grief, out of 100% of it, he gave more than 70%, but right now, Jalilah wanted no one but him. Just to stay like this with his hand stroking her arm in the most consoling way she had ever felt, and his shoulder being the most calming comfort zone for her.

They sat there in utter silence, the kind of silence that had surpassed a thousand words. When Yazeed felt the way her breath rhyming had changed, he leaned closer to her face and found that she had already slept off. He smiled, not knowing his reason for smiling. At least he was happy for now, even though he knew he would hate himself for what he did tomorrow, but that would always wait. He wanted to have the feeling of it all, and so he set himself free. What he had realized about her was, she loved sleeping. And there was no way he was going to let her sleep on this sofa if he felt he could do that at first, he couldn't do that now.

But thinking about it, he realized that if he woke her up to go to the room, something might happen, she might have her traumatic attack again and feel bad upon herself. The only option he had was to carry her to the room, and he scooped her into his arms with just one swift. He thought that she would be heavy to carry, but now that he did, he could remember how easy it was for her to move her body the way she wanted when she danced ballet. He laid her down on the bed and brought the duvet to her neck. He sat beside her and recited some sleeping supplications for her and couldn't stand up.

He just loved to stare at her while she slept, it gave him one of the most beautiful feelings he had never imagined he could feel again. He knew even if he tried sleeping, there was no way he could, a lot of things had happened which he knew wouldn't let him sleep even if he wanted to. His hands naturally went to his lips and he couldn't believe he had kissed Jalilah. The same Jalilah he had a huge fight with yesterday. As much as he didn't want to ponder over it, he knew there was no way this kiss would skip his mind. She had the most luscious lips he had ever known, and without doubt, she was a good kisser.

His eyes wandered softly to her lips and he quickly stood up, what the hell? He clasped his eyes shut and walked out of the room. He softly closed the door behind him and walked to the sofa they had just left. Everything got back to him in a rush, all the words she had uttered, the way she had cried and her body shook with her pains. The way she trembled with fear, everything that had happened just a few hour or hours ago in the exact place he sat. He wished she didn't have to experience that, she looked so vulnerable and so much in pain that at some point, Yazeed felt as if what he felt before could never match she had felt.