Why does it not surprise me that you were just yanking my chain? $300 a month for the next 12 months till the debt is paid off. $100 per person per month. I paid you more than that in rent you slime ball. Whatever. I guess it's action time. You think you can do this and get away with it? HA!
First stop: Judge's signature on the paper saying that I can legally pursue filing a judgment and more against you.
Second stop: Clerk of Judicial Records to file the judgment. But wait! What's this? I can file a Writ of Execution today too? I thought that could only happen 30 days after the judgment was filed! Guess not! I can't wait! What do I have to do? Take this paper to the sheriff's office? Sounds good! I'll be right back!
Third stop: Sheriff's office to figure out the cost of filing for the Writ of Execution and the poundage fee for the deputies to come out and protect me and hold the event. "Go back to the clerk's office, then go get two envelopes and two stamps at the post office across the street, then come back and we will finish this paperwork for you!"
Fourth stop: Clerk of Judicial Records yet again. Wait, you have to pay all my fees for today? The fee to file the judgment? The fee at the sheriff's office? The poundage fee? Hell yeah! Oh damn! Now you really messed up! The total went from $3,607.17 to over $3,900!!!! DAMN! Oh that just made my day!
Fifth stop: A dollar and change at the post office to get revenge? So worth it. Now I have my exact change, bills and coins, to pay the sheriff!
Sixth stop: Back to the sheriff! Okay the $137 and change is paid. The documents are filed. Oh don't worry, I made sure to not screw over the lovely landlord who helped me get out of the lease. Since at the Sheriff Sale the marked belongings will be sold, I told them not to mark the landlord's fridge, oven, washer, dryer, microwave, or air conditioners. This way, instead of padding the total with items that aren't even yours, I will be taking items that are legally yours and only yours! Did you forget that I lived in that house for a while? I helped move you in you fool. I know all your tricks. See you soon! Can't wait to see what they list for sale!
YOU ARE READING
To My Dear Ex Boyfriend,
Non-FictionHey! I know it's been a while since we talked, but I wanted to update you on how it's going! So I wrote this story to let you know what's been going on since our breakup! I hope you enjoy it! Edited Version: In the process of editing the story to re...
