♡ Bench Trio Oneshots ♡

• Depersonalization? •

(hi, hello, hey, am projecting again. I had a bad-ish day the other day, so I'm gonna make it a little over-exaggerated, but most will be related. Have fun reading it :) (Angst to fluff))

Cw/Tws:
- Depersonalization/Derealization (?)
- Panic attack (?)
- Sobbing
- Stimming through pain 🥲👍🏻
- Uncensored Cursing
- Yeah that's pretty much all I have in mind.

Enjoy :)
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He knew it wasn't gonna be a good day already. Tommy had woke up not feeling like himself, like he knew what was happening, he knew he was supposed to be there, but it didn't feel real. Nothing felt real to him.

Tommy just forced himself out of bed, being careful not to look in a mirror. It's results would be terrible.

"Hey Tommy! You awake, king?" Tubbo called through Tommy's door, not wanting to just bust in in case he was changing or something.

"Yeah, I am." "Okay! Just making sure." Tubbo replied, passing the wavering in Tommy's voice as him just being tired.

Tommy went to grab jeans and his iconic shirt, but when he put on the jeans, sensory overload almost came over him. What the fuck? It usually isn't this bad. Hell is wrong with him today?

Tommy just pulled off the jeans and laid them on his bed, opting for more comfortable black sweatpants (that were baggy, tight shit on bad sensory days would fucking send him). Then deciding the iconic shirt didn't match, he went for a blue short sleeved shirt. 'Good enough.' he though to himself and combed through his hair, deciding it's fine and going to brush his teeth.

'Just keep NOT looking in mirrors, and you'll be fine.' Tommy reminded himself, brushing his teeth quickly and forcing himself to not look in a mirror.

Luckily, the three didn't have much to do today, so hopefully it won't be too bad today. If they had shit to do, Tommy would have to tell Tubbo and Ranboo about his stupid mental shit, and, quite frankly, he didn't want to.

Tommy hadn't told the other two yet, but he just had days where it was like this. It wasn't too too often, only happens about 2 times a month or even less, so it's not like it'd hurt the other two to not know, right?

Tommy splashed cold water on his face, hoping to ground himself in some type of way. It kinda helped, but not enough to where everything felt real. 'Fuck me.' he thought, walking out of the bathroom after patting his face off.

"Hey, big T!" Tubbo greeted, Tommy giving a small smile and nod as a reply. Tubbo took it, because it wasn't really off for Tommy. He usually did that when he didn't want to be awake and was thinking "Fuck the world (except Tubbo and Ranboo. Those two are fine.)", or if he was just still waking up.

"Hey Tommy." Ranboo said and nodded, walking past the blond and sitting on the couch with Tubbo.

Next thing Tommy knew, he was sitting next to the other two. What the fuck? When did he fucking sit down?

"Hey, you alright? You've looked kind of out of it for the last five or ten minutes." Ranboo asked, Tommy's paranoia, or anxiety, he didn't care enough to tell the two apart, rising. Fuck, he wasn't there for a whole fucking ten minutes?

"Y-Yeah, I'm fine." Tommy stuttered a small bit, hoping the others' didn't notice. They either didn't notice or didn't care, because they accepted the response and went back to watching what ever was on the TV.

This was starting to get worrying. He never was just "not there" for ten fucking minutes, unless it was a real bad day. Shit, fuck, piss.

"-my? Tommy!" Tommy was, once again, shaken out of his thoughts, or lack there of. What the fuck?