ambivalent • a tronnor au ✔️

Chapter 9

*i wrote 12 chapters of this already (I'm still writing more) so I'll jut update randomly, k?

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As soon as we got home, Troye and I put on our pajamas, opened up Netflix, and started to watch 'Juno' on my bed.

But soon, that all backfired as Troye fell asleep.

As creepy as it sounds, I was enjoying watching Troye sleep more than I was enjoying watching the movie. His snores were barley audible, but still there. His hair was flat against his forehead, making him look exceptionally cute.

Quickly, I realized what I was saying and tried to shake my thoughts away. I tried to concentrate less on Troye, but the universe was against me today, because sleepy old Troye's head fell right on top of my shoulder, making a louder snore escape his lips.

My heart started beating faster. "Shit" I muttered under my breath.

I wanted to wake him - but then again I wanted him to sleep. As much as it pained me to do it, I decided that waking him would be the best option. He'd probably want to go to bed anyways.

"Troye?" I whispered, slightly shaking his body. He groaned in response and buried his head deeper into my shoulder. "Troye boy. Wake up" I shook him some more, praying to god he'd notice and get off my shoulder.

"Wha- oh god" he quickly lifted his head up and looked at me with wide eyes. "Oh shit, sorry Con." I couldn't help but laugh at his flustered state. "Not funny"

"It kinda is" I replied, still laughing. "You act like I cared that you were sleeping on me. I just woke you up because I thought you'd be more comfortable on your bed." I gestured to the air mattress laying on the ground.

"Oh. Yeah I guess you're right. Can we resume Movie night later on?" He asked, clearly upset that he missed most of his favorite movie.

"Of course"

--
That night I was tossing and turning like crazy. No matter what I did, I couldn't fall asleep.

I kept thinking about what Tyler said.

You totally like him

His words were repeating in my head, unable to get out.

But was he right? Did I like Troye?

I began to think back I the past couple of days.

How I felt happiness when I hugged him.

How I could never describe the feeling I feel when I'm around him.

How I blushed when he called me cute.

How I agreed to watch a stupid movie because it's his favorite.

How I got lost in his eyes.

How I liked to watch him sleep.

Suddenly, I jolted up, hitting my funny bone against my bed side table in the process.

"Fuck" I muttered, holding my funny bone in pain.

"Connor?" Troyes raspy voice asked, clearly he had just woken up due to my clumsiness. "You alright?"

"Y-yeah" I stuttered, all of a sudden nervous around him. "Just hit my funny bone"

"Why are you up? I've heard you tossing and turning for the past hour or so" I quietly thanked God that it was dark in the room so he couldn't see my blushing cheeks.

"I just - I've just been thinking about this upcoming summer." I sighed, mentally slapping myself for the stupid excuse I just made. "I'm sorry for waking you. Let's get to bed"

"Alight. Night Con! Sweet dreams"

I smiled widely as I replied "you too, Tro. You too"

As I laid back down, i sighed heavily. My previous inquires have been answered. I've come to a conclusion, and frankly, it scared me.

As much as I wanted to deny it, I couldn't.

I like Troye Sivan Mellet

--

"Wait, I almost forgot to ask, how was your guys' movie night last night?" Tyler asked, winking in my direction.

"It was alright. Other than the fact that I fell asleep halfway through the movie." He giggled.

His laugh is adorable

My cheeks turned red at the thought. After realizing that I actually do have a crush on him, I started to analyze every little thing he did, which caused me to blush almost every time I'm around him.

I finally realized what Tyler meant when he said I was obvious.

"Yeah! I'll go get it right now!" Troye answers Tyler in excitement. Obviously I missed out on their entire conversation because I had no clue what he was talking about.

"Wait what?" I asked, coming back to reality.

"I was going to go get some Nutella for Tyler. He wanted some" Troye laughed, obviously nothing I zoned out.

"Oh" and with that, Troye was out the door. i turned to Tyler, who was wearing a sly smile on his face. "You did that on purpose, didn't you?"

"How'd you know?" He joked, his smile slowly fading away. "I'm going to talk and I'm going to make it fast. What's the deal? Why are you acting so weird?" His voice had a hint of concern. I'm sure he noticed my lack of concentration and the major bags under my eyes, who couldn't?

"I-" I started, looking around to make sure Troye wasn't coming back. when the coast was clear, I started talking again. "Here's the thing. You can't tell Troye"

Tyler raised an eyebrow, but nodded in agreement anyways.

"So, last night I couldn't sleep. and the reason for that being, I was thinking. Thinking about what you said earlier to me in the hall." I breathed. "I mean I really thought about it"

"And?" He asked, trying I get me to hurry up with my story.

"And I think you're right." I paused once more, making sure I was in the clear. "I think I like Troye. Like really like Troye."

I looked up to see Tyler's reaction. His mouth was open in a wide smile and his eyes were lit up. "Can i say it?"

I rolled my eyes and nodded.

"TOLD YOU SO!" He nearly yelled. "Mamas never wrong" he chuckled, having pride in himself knowing that he was right all along. "So what made you finally realize that I was right?"

"To be honest? I don't know. Everything really. His smile, his laugh, his eyes. Oh god, have you seen his eyes? I get lost in them every time I look at him. Not to mention he looks incredibly cute when he's sleeping. Tyler, I really fucking like Troye."

Tyler was about to say something, but stopped when we heard a noise come from the hallway. "We'll continue this later" he winked.

Troye came tumbling in with 2 jars of Nutella and a huge smile across his face. "I had three, but I dropped one and now it's at the bottom of the stairs" he explained. "Sorry"

"It looks like you've received the best news of your life, Troye. What's with the smile?" Tyler inquired, noticing his new change in mood.

"Oh, I was talking with Nicola and Dustin downstairs. They're really funny, Con" Troye chuckled, sitting down.

"Alright - anyways, are we going to play 20 questions or not?"