ambivalent • a tronnor au ✔️

Chapter 13

Watching Troye sleep was a dream come true. As I said before, he's adorable. And even more adorable considering he's in my arms.

As amazing as it was to have Troye in my arms, I was getting a little bored - but I didn't want to sleep. So I decided to log onto tumblr.

I was worried about Troye. He was scared - obviously - but I feel like he wasn't just scared of the dream. I felt like he was scared of losing something, Scared of losing me.

I took a deep breath at the thought of Troye being scared of losing me, so I made a promise to myself. A promise to never lose Troye like I had before.

But I decided to start focusing on the more positive things now. Like, for example, Troye freaking likes me! He actually likes me!

The scene kept replaying in my head. Over and over. His words repeating again and again.

Having Troye as a friend is amazing, Don't get me wrong, but sometimes - sometimes I just wish we were a little more than that.
-
A week and a half later

It's been nearly two weeks since we admitted our feelings, and yet, nothing. It's almost like we never told each other. It's almost like he changed his mind about me. It's almost like he didn't care.

And that pissed me off.

"Connnnnnnah!" Troye called from the closed bathroom. "Connie what time are we leaving?"

Since Tyler is leaving for Michigan tomorrow, he decided to throw a last minute party, inviting his friends - which included Troye and I.

"It's 5:30... We were suppose to leave 5 minutes ago, Troye!" I called, slightly annoyed.

"Shit! Okay okay I'm sorry, Con, my quiff just isn't holding up!" He groaned in frustration. "For the love of God, please come and help!"

I rolled my eyes slightly, but happily walked to the bathroom. As I opened the door, Troye immediately smiled in my direction and motioned for me to style his quiff.

I carefully put my hands up in his hair, playing with it ever so slightly as I styled it. Putting my hands through his hair made me feel a spark.

I wish I could always play with his hair. I wish I could have my hands tangled in ha hair as his ate around my neck. I wish that when - and if - I ever kiss him, that this - this is where I'd want me hands to lay.

I wanted to be the one Troye comes to if he has any problems. I want to be the shoulder to cry on. I want to be the one he has lost of trait and respect for. I want to be able to kiss his lips and hold his hand. I want to be able to call him mine. I wanted Troye. Was that too much to ask?

Probably. But a boy can dream, right?

"There. All done" I smiled, backing away.

"You didn't even put it in a quiff!"

"I know. You look cute with your hair flat, Troye boy" I winked.
--
"con, are you alright?" Troye asked, obviously noticing how my hands were clenched around the wheel in frustration.

"We're going to be so late" I muttered under my breath. If there was one thing I hated most, it would be being late. I've always hated to idea of showing up late for something - whether it's a class or a movie. I hated it. "So late" I repeated.

"I'm sorry... I know you hate being late. This is all my fault, with my stupid quiff and ugh I'm sorry"

"Don't apologize, Tro. It's not your fault" I lied. Truth was, it was his fault. Not because he took to long to style his quiff, but because his beauty was so damn distracting that I took a wrong turn, making us go the long way to Tyler's. "I took the wrong turn" I smiled "therefor it's my fault"