Never Have I Ever | J.JK Fanfiction

[ Jeon Jungkook ]

Will you be able to make me remember this lovely day till I die? Isn't that what you're supposed to do? I hope you do coz never in my entire life do I want to forget this day.

When I woke up in the morning today, I remembered what happened. I remember shouting at her. I remember her teary eyes. I remember how scared she was. But I also remember how I slept in her arms, safe and cared for. 

Isn't she special, dear diary? So precious?

Why is she like this? I shouted at her, I almost hurt her, she didn't budge? Why would she stay back for me after all that? It makes me smile, what she spoke of. My dad, mom, Hyejin. And...herself.

I want to see her. I want to thank her for all that she did. I want to see her pretty smile.

But, before that, I wanted to see my parents.

Before I could do anything, I heard their knocks on the door. I felt like I wanted to make myself presentable to them. I wanted to be happy, for them. I brushed my hair, washed my face simply and let them into what I'd kept locked away for all these days.

It wasn't 'they'. It was 'him'. My dad. 

I felt myself get tensed under how he looked. He looked colder than usual. I even doubted for a moment, did Y/n do something? Or did I do something? 

He stepped forward and just...hugged me. 

I froze at that moment. I felt things. I felt burdens lift off me. 

He just hugged me tight. He pulled me close. He caressed my head like mom used to do. He made me hug him back. He felt so warm. So safe. I had never noticed. 

He didn't speak. He just stayed like that. I don't have any idea, for how long. 

Once he pulled away, he had that smile on his face that I had always yearned to see. He looked so handsome. I realized, I missed my old man. I missed his smile. I missed the way he looked at me with all those stars in his eyes. His eyes...they were tearful. I felt my eyes getting wet the more I looked into dad's eyes. Was he crying? I still do not know.

Maybe, he really had his reasons. Maybe they just wanted the best for me. Maybe, a little opening up to them would've helped. 

His smile widened. He patted my face.

"I want to eat with you."

That was all that he spoke. That's it!

You have no idea how happy I felt. I missed eating with my dad?! Wow! 

He did nothing else. He looked at me for a last time and made his way out. I stood there like an idiot, a scarecrow. What had happened?

I wasn't able to find words to talk to him, the whole day. I think I heard him say sorry for scolding me without knowing what actually happened. I think I heard him talk about Y/n and how she was perfect for me. I think he spoke about how he was distraught after noona died, and all that he did was to keep me safe and sound, give me the best life. Maybe he said he failed to understand me.

He cried. For the first time. Right in front of me. I was helpless...I didn't know how to console him. He apologized numerous times. Saying sorry for every single thing he failed to do for me as a father. He apologized for every single thing he missed out on after noona died.

I just listened. It had been years since he talked to me like that. I didn't know how to speak to him. Mom was happy. She told me it'll be alright. She told me everything will fall back into their places, return to how it was, happy and calm. She told me she loved Y/n. 

Dad didn't change overnight, I suppose. I realize, he never did anything wrong. Just that...my ways isn't his ways.

We're different people with same feelings in our heart.

Dad wished me 'good night' today. He even kissed my forehead, just like how he used to put me to sleep when I was a child.

It's midnight. I'm still not asleep.

Everything replayed in my mind.

I couldn't help but share it all with you.

Maybe my heart is craving for something else.

My Y/n.

I can't wait to reveal it all to her.

She'll feel so stupid when I tell her I heard it all.

Anyways...

Good night, dear diary.