Belong to him - Jaekyung/Dan18+

Ch.11 Pain

WARNING: DISCOMFORT, BULLYING, HOMOPHOBIA,SEXUAL ASSAULT.

Dan's POV:

When will I stop dreaming about Jaekyung?

I woke up with a start, feeling a warmth in my pants that I knew all too well. I had been dreaming about Jaekyung, the man I had been having feelings for since the meeting in the library. I slowly looked down to see the stain on my pants, confirming my embarrassment. I was no longer a teenager, but here I am, having these dreams.

I am supposed to be angry at him.

I gradually sat up from my deep slumber, finding myself caught in a web of mixed emotions. The remnants of my dream, filled with romantic moments involving Jaekyung, clung to my thoughts, creating a dissonance within me.

Confusion and a sense of ambivalence washed over me, despite the events that had transpired, I couldn't summon the anger I believed I should feel towards Jaekyung.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, I contemplated the conflicting emotions swirling within me. Understanding that dreams could be influenced by unresolved emotions and desires.

I took a deep breath, allowing myself a moment of introspection. I recognized that my feelings towards Jaekyung were complex and multifaceted. While the anger should have been present, I couldn't deny the deep connection I had shared with Jaekyung in the past few weeks.

After cleaning up, I went to the kitchen to make breakfast. I tried to push my embarrassing morning out of my mind, but as I cooked, I could feel the heat in my cheeks rising. I had to face the fact that I was still attracted to Jaekyung, and I was too old to be having wet dreams.

"I am so pathetic."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Third person's POV:

Many days following their fallout, Dan found himself caught in a whirlwind of conflicting emotions whenever he crossed paths with Jaekyung on campus or after class. The pain of their severed connection weighed heavily on his heart, leaving him feeling vulnerable and unsure of how to navigate their encounters.

With each glimpse of Jaekyung, Dan's instinctual response was to hide or quickly divert his path, hoping to avoid any potential conversations or eye contact. The fear of facing the aftermath of their disagreement and the possibility of further hurt or confrontation lingered in his mind.

The once vibrant and comfortable campus now felt like a minefield, filled with a mix of anticipation and anxiety. Dan's heart would race at the sight of Jaekyung, his footsteps hastening as he sought a safe distance, a temporary shield against the emotions that threatened to resurface.

While Dan yearned for the rekindling of their connection, the pain of Jaekyung's hurtful words echoed in his thoughts. The conflict between his lingering romantic feelings and the sting of betrayal made it difficult for him to confront Jaekyung directly.

Each day, Dan grappled with the internal struggle of whether to face his fears and engage in a conversation or to continue avoiding Jaekyung altogether. The uncertainty and emotional turmoil left him feeling isolated, longing for a resolution but unsure of how to attain it.

As time passed, Dan knew that hiding and running away would only prolong the pain and keep them both trapped in a state of unresolved tension. Deep down, he recognized the need for open communication and vulnerability, even if it meant facing the discomfort head-on.

Summoning courage from within, Dan resolved to confront the situation. He acknowledged that healing and understanding could only be achieved through honest dialogue. It was time to address the hurtful words, express his lingering feelings, and seek closure or reconciliation, whatever the outcome may be.