Silence - Adopted By Elizabeth Olsen

21.

Lizzie's POV
"We're hoping you." The female officer smiles warmly at me. "Me?" I ask them confused.

Of course, I want to. I've wanted to from the first week but I always assumed it would be partly taking care of her and I don't know- It is what I want but not what I expect. Am I ready for this? To really be a mother.

I need to think about it. I have to. For Casey's sake.

"I'll do it." I mutter.

I look at the officers with wide eyes, covering my mouth with my hand, internally scolding myself. Didn't I just agree to think about it? Why did I blurt that out like it's about which candy to buy?

I can't just buy another one, it's a human life. I mean technically I can buy another one, but that's not the point. "I- I need to make a call. Can I make a call?" I ask them with pleading eyes, they both nod before leaving the room.

I click on my second most-dialled contact, letting the phone ring. It doesn't take long before she picks up.

"Hey Lizard, are you okay?" She answers.

"Hey mom, I need to talk to you about something." I begin carefully.

"Well, that doesn't sound good. What's on your mind?"

"I think I'm about to adopt a child, but-"

"FINALLY I'M BECOMING A GRANDMOTHER!" She exclaims, not even letting me finish the previous sentence.

"Mom that isn't helping." I sigh, rubbing the bridge of my nose.

"Sorry sweetheart, please continue." She says seriously after taking a few deep breaths.

"I don't know if I'm ready. I've been taking care of Casey for a few weeks now and she feels like my child, but her actually being my child? That is something entirely different. There's so much that could go wrong."

"Her name is Casey huh? That sounds cute, Casey and Elizabeth Olsen." She thinks out loud.

"Mom."

"Right sorry. Yes having a child is a very big commitment and I promise you a lot will go wrong. Knowing you, you've been acting like the fun aunt. Being a single mother also comes with the burden of being the bad guy. You two will have arguments and you'll question yourself more than anyone you've ever met."

"I love you mom but this isn't helping."

"Do you want my honest advice or tell you to just do it?"

"Honest advice..."

"I love you too sweetheart, but you're thinking too much. You want to be a mother, your sisters would love to have a niece and I desperately want to become a grandmother." 

"What's your point?" I ask her curiously, knowing my mother gives the best advice but also knowing it takes some time to get there.

"You'll get the first one for free. Lesson one of being a parent: 'Put your child first.'"

"Does that mean I have to pay for the rest?" I chuckle through the phone.

"Yes, but I'll accept a grandchild as a downpayment. Now go ask her and let me know when you two are coming home, I'll start childproofing my house." She states seriously, ending the call only seconds later.

I sit there for a few moments, letting her words sink in. She's right, apart from what I want, what does Casey want? 

I walk out of the door, immediately getting greeted by the two officers who look impatiently at me. "I'd like to speak to Casey before officially deciding." I tell them camy. They look at each other before one of them walks away to a different room.

Minutes later she comes running back, a weird feeling starts to unfold in my stomach as I watch her close in on us. Where is Casey?

"We lost the kid." She mumbles, slightly out of breath. The other officer looks at her with wide eyes, slowly turning back to me.

"You what now?!" I shout at them before taking deep breaths, realising this won't help the situation. "You have 10 minutes to bring her back to me or I will sue the both of you and come for everything you own." I state, turning around and walking away to the bathroom.

We played hide and seek at the house a few times, and half of the time I found her in a bathroom. So I look through every stall in the hope to find her. Of course, no luck.

This girl does love to disappear.

I make my way to the front desk, walking right past one of the officers who motions for me to stop moving. I look under the desk, not finding Casey. I'm about to ask the officer if she has seen my daughter when I see her from the corner of my eye.

I can't hide the smile on my face as I make my way outside, looking at Casey who is playing with a dog in the rain. I've never seen her this carefree, not even when Rose and Scarlett were here. She's just enjoying her time outside, playing in the mud and cold rain with a creature she just met.

This moment right here made all my doubts disappear like they were cookies in Casey's hand. Not a single crumb left.

I want to be the person that makes her feel safe, loved and protected. The person she deserved from the start.

I walk through the rain, trying to ignore the cold water that starts to soak my clothes. The dog stops barking from joy when it sees me, making Casey look up from the stick in her hand. My body physically hurts when I notice her smile turning into a frown.

I slowly approach her, petting the dog along the way. She doesn't move, which can both be good and bad. She isn't running away from me but she isn't running towards me either.

"Casey, I would like to talk to you. Can we go inside?" I ask her from a distance, hugging myself with my arms to fight the cold. She looks at me intently before shaking her head. "Okay, I don't like police stations either." I smile weakly, earning myself a small smile in return.

"The officers asked me a question." I begin, but stop when I notice her trembling lip.

She rapidly shakes her head before speaking. "Please mama, I don't want to go with them." She pleads. A conflicted feeling starts to form. Happy that she doesn't want to go, that she still calls me mama, a nickname that has easily become my favourite word in the world.

"They wanted me to decide for you, but it is your life. So you get to make the decision. Either you stay with me or-"

"You!" She exclaims, clapping her hands and jumping up and down in joy. "What about the other option?" I shout back at her. She runs towards me, jumping into my arms as she irrupts into fits of giggles.

"I'll always choose you." She mumbles against my skin as she buries her head inside my neck.

Seconds later, rain comes falling down as if it's trying to fill an ocean. Barely able to see her, I hold onto Casey tighter. "Are you sure?" I ask her, praying to god that she hasn't changed my mind. 

She looks up from my shoulder with a frown, slightly tilting her head. "Are you?" She asked with a raised eyebrow, making me chuckle with happy tears in my eyes.

"I've never been more sure of anything. I love you." I say, booping her nose.

She starts to giggle, her cheeks becoming red. "I love you too mama."