Makes me Feel at Home

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Neil and I didn't talk much the morning after, just exchanged a couple of giddy smiles, shoulder bumps on our way down the hallways. It was third class now, our study period. As I sit back down at the table from the pencil sharpener, I see a small piece of paper sticking up out of the top of my text book. I slide it out to see my name written, in the most beautiful cursive that could only belong to one person.

(Meet me in the library after study hall, N)

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(Meet me in the library after study hall, N)

I smile, and look up across the room to see a wide grin spread from cheek to cheek across Neil's face. I fold the note up and stick it into my pocket, and try my hardest to concentrate on my work, but those butterflies are running a roller derby around my stomach, and geography really isn't all that important anyways, and Meeks is trying to explain something to me, but I'm only listening halfway because almost every fiber of my being is thinking about Neil.

Finally the block is over, and I search for Neil but he seems to have already left. Maybe had to drop something off with a teacher first. I wait for all the other guys to be immersed in conversations with other people before I slip out, not wanting anyone to follow me to the library. The walk there is long and treacherous, but alas I make it, and it's only two steps into the library that I'm grabbed by the hand and pulled towards the side. Neil drags me all the way to the back row of shelves, where he lets go of my hand.

"I skipped out a little early to make sure that no one else was here." He says. I lean my back up against one of the shelves.

"And why wouldn't we want anyone else here?" I ask, praying for one answer, but doubtful I'll get it. But to my surprise, Neil leans in close, and softly plants a kiss on my cheek.

"I didn't want anyone else to spoil it." he grins, leaning back in to kiss me on the lips this time. I kiss him back, and that's just how we stay for a moment. I bring my hands up to rest them on his hips, and he caresses the side of my head with one of his hands.

Call me crazy, but there's something about kissing Neil that makes me feel at home. Maybe it had to do with the fact that I never felt that way in my actual home. Or maybe it was because I had never felt that way about someone before, let alone have someone feel that way about me. Of course, my parents loved me, but what Neil and I had was different. It was felt without words, without obligations. This was someone who took interest in me by choice, not because I'd come from their womb. He knew me, better than anyone knew me, better than I knew myself, and it just felt so right that way. And so that's how we spent the next little bit, just in each other's presence.

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