Every Part Of Us

1. Shit talking

I hesitated. I hated the fact that I did but I couldn't deny the pause that happened when I looked at the text. I had been aware that Connor, my old roommate, was graduating this winter but I hadn't actually thought that it would be something that I had to think about at all.

I had a very complicated relationship with Connor. His alcohol addiction had destroyed any friendship we had but now that he was sober we both tried to restore things. It hadn't worked perfectly but the effort was there. Even with the reconciliation I hadn't expected that he'd reach out and invite me to the graduation party his boyfriend Jetson was throwing for him.

I'm pretty sure it was supposed to be a surprise but everyone knew that Jetson wasn't capable of keeping that to himself. The poor guy was terrible with secrets and I bet it had only taken a few hours for him to spill to his boyfriend and spoil the surprise.

Looking at the text I had taken a few seconds to just think. Part of me thought about denying but Connor was a friend and I couldn't turn my back on him even if I had tried over the years.

I was proud of the progress he'd made from the guy who I found half passed out drunk almost on a daily basis to now. He'd pulled himself together and I was happy for him. I wanted to show that but still there was so much that had happened. There was years worth of insults and lies, it was hard to erase all that.

It was hard for me to move past it all especially when some of those words still echoed around in my head every time I saw him.

So I hesitated. I didn't jump at the chance of going to see him. I'd told him that it would take time and I didn't know if now was that time.

Everyone else had moved on and forgave him and sometimes I hated that a part of me couldn't just do that. There was still a part of me that was expecting the worse, that I'd try with him only for the cycle to continue. I think I was scared to go back down that road.

So that's why I was here staring at my phone not knowing what to do.

It was all stupid and I hated it.

Instead of sitting around waiting until I made a decision I pressed the contact of my best friend knowing that he'd make the decision for me.

"Hey Jake's busy." Evan, Jake's boyfriend, answered the phone.

Evan had officially moved in with Jake during our senior year and they were basically attached at the hip. It wasn't often that I saw one without the other.

"Can you tell his ass to get unbusy so I can talk to him?" I questioned.

"Maybe if you ask me nicely."

Evan and I's relationship had improved a lot since they started dating. I'd been hesitant in the beginning. I tended to be protective of my friends and Jake was like a brother to me. My protectiveness hadn't come out in the right way. I was just happy things had improved and now Evan and I were friends.

"Fuck off," I groaned.

"You're so nice to me." Evan laughed. "Jake wake up and talk to Adam before I decide to throw him off the nearest bridge."

I smiled at his words. Evan and I shit on each other but it was all jokes now. I listened as there was rustling on the other end.

"What do you want?" Jake groaned into the phone.

"Are you going to Connor's grad party?" I asked.

"That's what you wanted to talk about? Why couldn't you just ask Evan that?"

"Because I didn't want to ask him." I answered.

"Rude I can hear you." Evan butted in.

"Can't believe you woke me up from my nap for this." Jake complained.

"Answer the question and you can go back to your nap." I replied.

"I only have five minutes before I have to be up so I actually can't go back to my nap." He argued.

"Says who?"

"His planner." Evan answered.

"I thought we agreed you were going to burn that thing when he was sleeping."

"I tried but he's got like five backup planners." Evan argued.

"God he's the worst." I shook my head.

"You know I'm still here." Jake deadpanned.

"Whatever so are you going to the party or not?"

"Yeah you want to carpool with us?" Evan answered.

"Can we force Jake to drive?" I asked.

"Obviously." Evan agreed.

"I really hate you guys." Jake grumbled.

"You love us now go back to your nap so we can keep shit talking you." His boyfriend laughed.

"Can you at least go into the other room so I don't have to hear your annoying ass voice?"

"Oh I'll show you annoying." Ev threatened.

I took that as my cue to say goodbye. It was a fine line with them between bickering and sex. They got off on riling each other up with teasing insults and meaningless arguments.

"Alright I'm going to hang up before I hear anything that will make me want to cut my ears off." And then I hung up before they could say anything else.

It was better that way. If I had to hear even a second of what those two did when they were alone I think I'd actually die. Well maybe not die but I would probably throw up.

I looked back down at my phone to see the text conversation with Connor still open. I needed to come up with my answer. I shouldn't have pushed it off like this.

I stared at the text again.

Connor- hey I don't know if Jet told you but he's throwing me a party for my graduation next Saturday and I'd really love it if you could come

Connor had reached out even though Jetson had thrown all the information in the group chat inviting everyone. I knew that he'd reached out and he wanted me to be there. We'd been close once and it would mean something to him to have me there.

I wanted to be there and celebrate all that he'd accomplished. I wanted that. I wanted to see him and I wanted to make things right with us.

I had missed my friend.

Adam- I'll be there

It was time to stop letting fear get in my way.

A/n:

Hi! Hi!

The first chapter is finally here! I really hope that you guys enjoy this story and are excited to join me on this journey. It's only been like a week but I've missed uploading for you guys so I'm just super excited to be starting something new!

There will still be some bonus content to come for the other books but my main focus right now will be getting chapters of this book out to you guys. For now I'll be trying for uploads every Friday and if for some reason I have to miss a Friday I'll try to post on my page to let you guys know. I have been doing some writing for this book in preparation and I'm feeling inspired.

I hope you all enjoyed this chapter and I'll see you on Friday with a new chapter!

- Cora Leigh