Chapter 37

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TW dark thoughts, suicide attempt, depression

"Mer, sweetie.." Christopher gasped as he and Carolyn could finally go see Meredith after they had emptied her stomach.

"I know you two have always been working in the medical field. But I think I need to say this." Arizona started as she let them sit down first

"Go ahead." Christopher nodded and stroked his hand over Meredith's head. "Oh sweetheart.."

"We had to empty her stomach. It was a close call. We'll monitor her organs and she will feel miserable when she wakes up. She will be in pain, not to mention how her chronic illnesses will react to this." Arizona explained

"Can we get a minute with her, please?" Carolyn asked and stroke her hand over Meredith's pale cheek

"Of course. Page me when she wakes up. And then I guess we'll have to discuss what comes next.." Arizona sadly smiled

The two adults nodded and remained silent until Christopher suddenly spoke up

"Crap! I was supposed to pick up Amy.." He suddenly realized

"Call Mark and Derek. Ask them to pick her up and tell them to meet us at your office." Carolyn immediately said

...

About an hour later Meredith was still asleep, drugged from all the meds

"The boys are here. I'm meeting them now. Please.. Please call me if anything changes." Christopher begged his wife, terrified something would happen with his girl

"Of course. But she's stabilizing and she won't wake up immediately." Carolyn wanted to ease him

Christopher walked out of the room and rested his head against the wall for a minute as he tried to realize what had happened today

His little girl had tried to kill herself

He couldn't believe this was real. He walked to his office and saw Mark on his phone, Amelia who couldn't sit still and Derek

"Guys.." Christopher sighed

"What's wrong, dad? Is Mer admitted again?" Mark asked and Amelia immediately started worrying

"Is she?" Amelia carefully asked, scared for Meredith

"Guys, let's go inside the room, please." Christopher led them in

"Dad, what's wrong?" Mark asked worried

"Is it Meredith?" Derek asked then

"Mom found Meredith earlier this afternoon.. She was unconscious. Mom- Mom found out she tried.. she tried to end things.." Christopher hugged Amelia while he told them

"As in killing herself?!" Mark jumped up

Christopher could only nod. He couldn't say those words out loud. It hurt him to see his family hurting

"Mermer?" Amelia whispered

"Yes. But now she's here. She's in the ICU and she's doing okay." Christopher explained them all

"Can we see her? Please?" Derek asked his father

"Yeah but we can't go into her room. She's still asleep." He explained and took them to the ICU to see their sister

"Daddy, I'm scared." Amelia admits and kept holding onto his hand

"You don't have to come see her if you don't want to. She doesn't look like the Meredith we know." Christopher said

"No.. I- I wanna see her." Amelia nods and felt Mark grab her other hand

"Mer-" Derek muttered as he was the first to recognize his sister

Meredith had an oxygen mask strapped around her face while an IV was in her arm and machines were beeping around her.

"Daddy-" Amelia started crying in her father's arms

Mark bursted the door open without thinking and hugged his mom, followed by Derek who stood in the doorway, lost for words

"Mom-" Mark hugged Carolyn

"Mark-" Carolyn hugged the boy. "Derek, come here-" She reached her hand out for her other son

"Will she be okay?" Derek asked and checked the machines as he had some knowledge

"Of course she will be." Carolyn nodded and kissed their heads. "Can you two take Amy home? Dad will come home tonight as well but I'll stay with Mer for the night." Carolyn explained to the boys

"Of course, mom." The boys nodded.

"Please keep us updated about her." Mark said as he broke the hug and placed a kiss on Meredith's forehead. "Hang in there, Mer. We love you. We're all here for you. Damn, why did you do this?" He whispered and squeezed her hand softly

"I'm sorry for not being here enough for you, Meri. We love you." Derek kissed his sister's forehead as well

"Amy, let's go home. Let's give Mer some rest." Derek and Mark both reached out for her hand and took the crying girl out of the hospital

Christopher didn't wanna leave the hospital until he had seen Meredith awake. And finally after hours and a text from the boys to tell them Amelia was asleep, Meredith finally started to wake up

"Honey, shh. You're in the hospital." Carolyn said as she saw Meredith's eyes opening in fear

"No! No!" Meredith whimpered and cried out

"Honey, shh. Please-" Christopher beggedd his daughter

"I wanted to die!" Meredith cried, not thinking about what she said, she just felt so useless and disappointed for not making it work.

"Sweetie, why didn't you talk to us?" Carolyn asked the question that had keeping her busy the whole afternoon since she found Meredith unconscious

"Meredith, please.. Please say something.." Christopher begged

"I'm a burden." Meredith suddenly said, barely loud enough for her parents to understand. "You can't do anything with me." She repeated her mother's words

"You are not a burden. We are so proud to have you as our daughter, we'd never, ever wanna miss you." Carolyn said sternly, hugging her daughter as close as she could

Christopher kept stroking his hand over Meredith's hair. "Don't you ever dare to listen to that woman again, Mer. Ever." He told her

It took them a while to calm the girl down. She had been crying and she had been hurting. They had paged Arizona and she had been checking the girl out, confirming things looked okay.

Eventually Meredith finally fell asleep in Carolyn's arms. The woman didn't dare to let go of Meredith for several reasons as she would probably go look for Ellis and take her anger out but Meredith needed her right now.

"Christopher, go home. You should go check on the kids." Carolyn quietly said from her spot next to Meredith

"Okay.. But keep me updated, please." Christopher asked as he kissed his wife and then kissed his daughter's forehead. "We love you, sweetie. Hang in there." He said before leaving

Carolyn smiled a final time at her husband as she rehearsed what she'd say the next time she'd face Ellis, the woman that was responsible for all of this




We hope you enjoyed! Thanks to my co-writer _Ktje_

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