Chapter Eleven

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Your P.O.V.

Once the girls showed up on my television screen my stomach ached with fear. I was still curious on what they would say.

"Hello ladies, how are you." The same lady that I saw from the time I watched the security video popped up.

"We're good thank you." Ally responded while the others nodded.

"Well its been about two week since the incident at the John Don's Ice Cream shop, how is Y/N?"

"She is okay, shes still recovering both physically and mentally. That night has caused some memories that has affected her, but we have made it our priority to help her in any way possible." Lauren said glancing at the camera as if she was indirectly talking to me through the TV.

"Thats good to hear. Earlier today their was this video of Y/N speaking out for the first time as well, have you girl seen it?" The women asked and I felt my heart quicken. The girls shook their head and i mentally prayed she wouldn't show the video. The next thing I know the video had popped up on the screen. Great.

As the video played I felt myself cringe, my own reaction to the video made me mad at myself, i can only imagine what the girls are thinking. The things I was saying were true, but somethings I would like to keep to myself to prevent others to feel offended or hurt. Once the video finished, the screen went back to the girls and their faces said it all. The same shocked look that was on everyone else were now plastered on their faces. It was as if I just insulted them, and the feeling of doing that made my heart ache.

I looked over to my sister and parents and they had their eyes glued to the screen. I'm sure they weren't any more proud of my actions than I was.

"Do you have any idea why she believes she is not a hero, because clearly she is to many." The lady asked and i mentally answered that question myself with the same answer i've answered over an over again.

"Um well its just she refuses to believe that title because she can't live with the fact she killed someone. People handle things in different ways and sadly her way is affecting her mentally. But we will do everything in our power to prove to her that she is our little hero." Dinah said and I felt my eyes begin to water. I suddenly felt a hand place over top of mine and I looked over to see it was my dad. I gave him a small smile and proceeded to watch the girls.

"So in the security video Xavier had said he wanted to target you girls because you kicked his son out of the 96.1 radio station, causing his son to try and commit suicide. Do you have anything to say to his son?" The lady said pointing at the camera.

"Well we'd like to apologize for kicking you out, maybe if we'd let you stay none of this would of happened. We hope you're feeling well and our prayers go out to you and your family." Ally said.

"Anything you'd like to say to Y/N?" She asked and I prepared myself.

"Don't blame yourself, you're too special and beautiful to be hurting. I can see in your eyes that you will change because of the event that took place at the ice cream shop, but we will make sure you don't change in the wrong way. We love you, never forget that." Camila said looking at the camera. It was as if she was looking right through me and reading my secrets, secrets that should stay hidden.

"Never." I whispered with a smile creeping on my face, a real smile. I haven't done that in a while.

The rest of the interview went by fast, they talked a little more about the event and finished with their upcoming tour. I looked over to my family and they all had fallen asleep. The sight made my heart heat up. Dana was leaning on my Dad while he laid on my mother. My mother look so uncomfortable on the receiving end of the lean fest but i'm sure these moments she cherishes.

I decided not to bother them so I placed my right hand on the arm rest and prompted myself up. Every movement hurt, but not as much as I thought it would.

Before I was able to head up stairs I placed my hands in my pocket and felt a familiar box. I gripped onto the box and pulled it up to reveal the same cigaret box, along with the lighter. 'It will take the pain away' Mario's voice filled my head again. I forgot how it felt to feel no pain, maybe this'll help.

I slowly tipped toed to my backdoor, careful not to wake my family members. I opened the door and slipped outside. I sat down on the steps leading to a trail in the woods and pulled out a cigaret. I placed the cancer stick between my lips and lit it.

Every inhale felt like a release of stress and pain. Its like the smoke was now taking up the room in my body instead of the pain and stress, it was relaxing. I lifted up my shirt wanting to see how my wound looked. I pealed off the wrap and threw it to the side. It looked disgusting, the way my flesh poked out between the stitches, the way the blood was still slowly finding its way past it, and the way it felt like the raw meat that you buy at stores. Every disgusting thing about that single wound made me cringe, my whole body did. Every scar, cut, and bruise on my body has a story, its my own personal timeline. But i'm the only one who knows the stories by heart, and none of these wounds are wounds of a hero.
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"Y/N? Y/N WAKE UP! PLEASE!" I heard someone yell. I yanked myself out of my dream and opened my eyes. Normani was standing over me with a wet rag against my forehead while the other girls surrounded me on my bed.

"You had another nightmare." Normani said as if I hadn't already known.

"I'm fine."

"No you're not. You need help Ninj." Dinah said.

"Ninj?" I questioned her kinking my eyebrow.

"Yeah it short for ninja, since you're bad ass and all I thought of a ninja." She said and I smiled. I got a nickname from Dinah!

"Okay Ninj you need help." Dinah repeated.

"Like a therapist?" I asked sitting up from my bed to where I was leaning on the head rest.

"You wont talk to us." Ally said.

"And you think i'm going to reveal my deepest darkest secrets to a stranger?" I snapped causing them all to flinch.

"It was only an idea." Camila said placing her hand on my shoulder ever so lightly.

"Sorry its just, I don't like expressing my feelings to anyone." I admitted.

"Understandable, but you have to tell us somethings, thats the only way we can help you." Lauren pleaded and i nodded my head.

"We love you, never forget that." Ally said and I smiled.

"Never."
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A/N
Sorry for the long wait, i was sick this week and i had no energy to type so forgive me! I'll update as soon as I can i promise!! I LOVE YOU ALL!!! Tell me what you think about this story so far please!! I really wanna know.

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