Poetic Pain

Kiwon 26

I was probably the worst person in the world, here was a dude I'd spent a lot of time with, someone who had expressed having feelings for me, someone who I'd fucked numerous times... he was close to tears and I felt nothing. Maybe I wasn't the upstanding guy I thought I was, while I never intentionally led Tremario on, I never really set boundaries either, though I made it clear that I had no intention of leaving Dior, Tremario still held onto hope. I just wanted to get this over and done with so I could get on with my day, Tremario stepped towards me and I took a step back... clean break, even if it hurt him I needed to let him know that there was no scenario in which we would ever be together. I still wasn't able to directly meet his eyes, only brief glimpses where I would quickly look away, searching for anything to avoid this awkward conversation... FUCK! Why did Kira have to bring him over? I know why because she's a messy bitch, who thrives off my suffering. Fuck it, I just needed to man the fuck up and stop stalling.... I glanced out the window and saw Memphis, Monte, and Romeo laughing, I could hear Gotti upstairs saying 'aht, aht' and Kira complaining. Aight, Kiwon... stop fuckin around.

"Answer me this Kiwon, what is about Dior that you love so much?" Tremario asked.

"Before I answer... I want you to think about this, what made you think exposing our situation made you think I was going to get with you?" I asked and I could see his facade cracking, so the tears were fake. "Now, what I loved most about Dior is that he's the exact opposite of you. You were more concerned about spending money, Dior was more interested in making money. With you I had to move in the shadows, with Dior I didn't have to hide at all. When we were together, all I cared about was getting my nut and dippin... with Dior I was content with laying my head on his chest and listening to his heartbeat.... I love Dior, you were a jumpoff... Sorry if that's cruel but it's my truth." I said shrugging.

"A jumpoff? If I was such a jumpoff, why did you accept the key to my apartment?" Tremario asked and I could tell he was getting pissed.

"Easy ass-access." I said shrugging. "You offered and I was happy to not have to wait for you to unlock the door, I could pop up, get topped off, and leave... Noticed I NEVER stayed the night, you should've played your position but you couldn't even do that.... Again I'm sorry if my words sting but it's time for hard truths." I said.

"I don't fuckin get it Kiwon, I really fuckin don't.... like you know I have feelings for you and you don't keep playing in my fuckin face." Tremario said.

"I really don't know why you wanna be with me... I'm entering my hoe phase and all I'm going to do is cheat... I think the last few weeks have proven that I have a lot of growing to do and right now I'm not in the right place in my life where I could be with anyone and if I have to be honest and give you more hard truths.... even if I was ready for a relationship, it wouldn't be with you or anyone like you." I said honestly.

"Hard truths? Nigga your dick ain't even that good." Tremario said and I couldn't help but laugh, for a nigga with weak dick he sure is acting crazy ass fuck... I pray he never meets a nigga with good dick because he might just end up in jail. "And if you think my issue with Dior has anything to do with you, then you're even more delusional than I realized... My problem with that bitch is how he treats my friend and how your weak ass lets him say whatever he wants to your mom and sister."

"Not that it's any of your business, but Dior was a little too respectful if you ask me... he should've been cussed them out and they would've deserved it too. Don't get me wrong I love my mom and sister, but they were the ones who made Dior the problem... but that's a conversation I need to have with my family... You can wait outside." I said stepping past him and opening the door.

"FUCK YOU KIWON, OL'LIL DICK ASS NIGGA!!!!" Tremario said, now my dick is little... Lol, I'm not massive but it's far from little and yes I have proof. I slammed the door behind him just as Kira walked downstairs with thieving as Tarez, they looked like they didn't have much but Kira clearly had an attitude.