As We Fall (Blaise Zabini Fanfiction)

Chapter 49

Zoe

The small details of this place are the ones that have begun to enchant me the most. They ease the tension in my chest, cloaking my heart with a misleading veil of tranquility.

The leaves, for example. Particularly the ones that grow on the trees in the Outskirt. They're shaped like hearts, and knit so closely together that it looks like they're trying to shelter the branches sewn between them from the outside world. They're a dark, thick green, and the color possesses a peculiar liquid-like quality. Like if I reach out and try to touch them, I'll find my fingers dripping with oil paint.

"For someone who's been tasked with taking down one of the most dangerous wizards of all time, you think you'd try to pay better attention."

My head snaps up, gaze refocusing. "Wha -- oh...I'm sorry."

Vaughn Yun, whose young face is creased with decades worth of tension lines, smiles softly. It isn't an expression that reads as happy, though -- rather more mellow exhaustion.

"Don't apologize to me. Apologize to yourself, later, when you're facing off against your sadist of a twin brother and have no idea how to defend yourself."

We're in the Outskirt -- a term used by Beauxbatons students to refer to the vast and dense thicket of trees that line the edges of the school grounds.

This is where Ingrid told me I'd be meeting Vaughn for our first training session half an hour ago. He'd apparently preferred we meet somewhere outdoors, where it was hard for sound to carry and prying eyes to look in. I wonder why.

"If you don't mind me asking -- what exactly are you going to be teaching me, anyways? If that's even the right word for it."

"It's not the right word for it." He says. "I'm not exactly going to be teaching you anything. Think of it more like this: there's something in you -- powers, magic, call it whatever you like -- and it's my job to pull it out of you."

Confusion and unease pool like oil in my stomach. I take a nearby leaf in between my fingers, tug at it.

"And how do you intend to do that?"

"Well, I've got some ideas. Let's just say none of them are exactly painless."

He must sense my unease then, for he says, "Look, this isn't going to be a walk in the park. You knew that already. However, it is necessary. I'm going to do a lot of experimental things that you won't particularly like – induce fear, pain, anger. I want to see if whatever's in you will respond to the triggering of strong emotions and sensations."

He's right – I don't like the sound of it. Not one bit. But after everything I've endured over the past several months, I'm not as afraid as I might've once been. Pain, fear, anger – I've become well acquainted with these. Certainly I'll be able to grit my teeth through a bit more.

"Have you ever tried this on anyone else before?" I ask, before I've wondered if I even want to know the answer.

He doesn't speak, but the look on his face tells me everything I need to know.

My fingers return to the leaves, my mind retreating inward again.

"Look — let's start off easy. I want you to tell me a little bit about how all of this has affected you. How it's made you feel."

I feel something cringe back into me, like  spider skittering away from a sudden flash of light.

I suck in a breath. "Easy, you say?"

Vaughn gives me a look. "If we're going to do this right — and I certainly plan on it — then we're going to have to know each other. Trust each other. That starts with you talking to me. You have to choose to be a little vulnerable here."