As We Fall (Blaise Zabini Fanfiction)

Chapter 30

Zoe

A few days have passed since my dementor attack.

I'm not sleeping. Most nights, I can only manage to close my eyes for thirty minutes before my dreams erupt into torturous flashbacks of cloaked figures drawing rattling breaths, leaving me sleep-deprived and soaked in my own sweat. I've been taking a lot of showers, too. There's something about the gentle and steady flow of warm water against my skin that envelopes me in a feeling of safety. 

I've been avoiding Blaise, too -- and not for the same reasons I normally would.

I'm not angry or irritated with him, and we haven't bickered our way into a stone-cold silence as we usually do. Truthfully, it's quite the opposite. I want to thank him for saving me from the dementor, and for pulling me through my panic attack outside the DADA classroom, but I can't. When I'm around him, my knees feel weak. Despite all of the things I want to say to him, my lips refuse to utter a single word, and my unspoken thoughts remain on my tongue like unlit firecrackers. I feel timid and anxious around him, so I stay quiet instead. I don't talk to him about anything other than school-related topics during class, and it seems like there isn't a corridor in this castle that I haven't rushed down to escape him. 

Like I said, I don't want to avoid him. Things have begun to change between Blaise and I, and it's caused me to become riddled with nerves. There's something blooming between us -- something deep and complex and brand-new like spring, and for some reason, I'm running from it. And no matter how hard I think about it, I can't figure out why. It's frustrating me beyond belief.

Currently, it's late afternoon, and all sixth-years are on their break from classes. The flurry of dense winter snow has finally begun to die down, replaced by sugary lilacs that spring up around the edges of the Great Lake. I suspect they've been charmed -- some of them glitter and sing when you get close enough.

I'm sitting in the Great Hall right now, stress-eating my way through a plate of eclairs as I study for an upcoming Transfiguration test. The spacious room is pretty empty for a break period.

I'm so deep in focus that I don't notice when someone slides into the seat beside me.

A small cough sounds on my left, followed by a deep voice that says unsurely, "Uhm -- Zoe?"

My head snaps up. Blaise is sitting next to me, turned sideways to face me with his elbow on the table.

The half-eaten eclair I'm holding drops to my lap.

"Zoe?" He repeats.

"Yes?" The word rushes past my lips as if it'd been trying to escape. I slip my hand onto the back of my neck anxiously. 

"Well, you haven't been talking to me lately, and I don't know why." Blaise sighs. "But, I kind of need a favor from you."

"Okay." I say unsurely. What could he possibly be talking about? My nerves strain as I anticipate what he'll say next.

Blaise takes a deep breath. "Well -- I'm part of the Slug Club. I don't know if you know what that is, but -- well -- it's basically just a group of Slughorn's favorite students. He's having a party tomorrow night, and..." he trails off, his gaze dropping to his lap where he's pulling at his fingers. He seems restless, uncomfortable, and it's only when I spot the pink tinge in his cheeks that I realize he must be nervous. "Well, I need a date."

For a moment, I'm speechless. The cogs and screws in my brain slowly turn, analyzing his words and attempting to create sense out of them. Is he asking me to go with him to this party?

"It's just dinner, really. And a bit of dancing." Blaise's voice quivers. He glances up at the ceiling, as though asking it what to say next. "And I'd fancy you to go with me over anyone else, I guess."