TW: Mention of self harm
I hate it when I get random motivation and start something but then I don't have any more motivation to finish it. Or I'll just have no motivation to do anything so then I just sit in my bed watching Youtube for the day. It's annoying.
I'll have the motivation to color in a coloring book but I can't play Splatoon, clean my room, or make food for myself. I'll struggle to start things I want to do. I'm fucking lazy and can't get shit done. I have no life. Can't make plans, forget stuff, stay in my room all day looking at a screen while thoughts plague my mind, self harm, look at my arm.
I don't even have motivation sometimes to take care of myself. I'll just sit there thinking how disgusting I am but not act on it. I still do get around to taking showers, brushing my teeth, and doing laundry but it not on a schedule. It's when I do feel like it or when my parents make me. I'm a degenerate who lives on the internet, gaining weight and becoming fat (not hating on people who are fat. I just don't see it as me.. It still sounds bad. Sorry). Eating snacks out of boredom instead of drinking water. You would think I would get more sleep to avoid the negative moods and spirals I get into at nighttime but no.
