Tricked

So, I Talked To Your Mom

"So, I talked to your mom," he tells you on the way to the restaurant. You think so but are a little upset. It almost feels like he went behind your back to get to know you in case he didn't like you rather than taking the time to get to know you.

He takes your hand, feeling you are upset, and he wants to explain. 

"It's hard for me to express my feelings, but your mom makes it easier when I bounce things off of her. It's like she understands me."

You stare out the car window and nod, "Yeah, that's my mom." 

He is trying to smooth things over with you before getting to the restaurant, but you are so caught up in your chaotic thoughts about him, your mom, Jimin, and your own feelings that even though you hear him, you are having a hard time listening. 

"It has always been easier for me to keep my feelings to myself, to the point that sometimes I wish I were a rock." 

You look at him, "A rock? Why, because it can't feel anything?"

 He looks a little regretful and says, "To be honest, I'd rather not have to feel at all." 

Here is where your brain shuts off. It is like when a doctor tells a patient they have cancer, the only thing they hear is the word cancer, and their brain shuts down and doesn't hear anything else the doctor says. The word cancer is all that they hear in their head. Your heart felt like it had taken a hard blow, and you hitch a breath.

You didn't hear what else he had to say, "But I find with you I want to . . ."

Thinking to yourself, more like overthinking once again, 'He rather not feel anything? Then why did he kiss me? Why did he ask me out?' Suddenly, you think, 'Oh my god, is this his way of punishing me for what he thinks Jimin and I did? But that can't be. Your mom said the dinner reservations were made way before that. But is this his way of letting me know he would rather be a rock than be with me? He doesn't want to feel anything towards me? Then why take me out? Is he planning on doing something to....ugh, I don't know what to think. I'm just overthinking again.'

You both have fallen silent. When you reach the restaurant, the driver opens the door. Yoongi has gotten out on the other side to hurry around to open the door for you, but the driver got there first.

Yoongi goes to take your hand as you get out, but you put one hand on the door, and the other you let the driver take to help you out.

You automatically thank the driver but are still lost in your thoughts as you walk beside Yoongi and enter the restaurant. All you can think about is that he would rather be a rock than be with you.

Your mind is in a whirl of chaos. He wants to not have any feelings. Love is a feeling, and he doesn't want it. 'So if I love him, he can never love me back.'  You sigh as you sit at the table. 

He hears you, and as he sits across from you, he asks, "Are you ok?"

You can't help it, but with a little bit of attitude, you say, "Do rocks care?" 

You look across the table at him after placing your napkin on your lap. Thinking he misunderstood you, he asks, "What?" 

You shrug your shoulders, "Never mind."

He reaches across the table to gently touch the top of your hand. You move your hand back, reaching for your glass of water. He silently draws his hand back, frowning.

 "Have I done something to upset you, jagi?"

You look at him, a little surprised that he called you honey, "Don't call me that." 

He sits back, surprised by the biting tone of your voice. He looks upset now, too, "What the hell is going on with you?" 

He knows your mom wouldn't lie to him about your feelings, so what is going on? He is at a loss.

At this moment, the waiter comes asking if you are ready to order and if you would like to start off with a wine. Before you can say anything, and without him asking you, Yoongi says, "Yes, a bottle of your best wine would be nice." 

He thinks he would rather have a whiskey right now, though. The waiter looks at you for confirmation, and you give a brief nod, and he leaves the table.

Yoongi looks at you, glaring at him. "What have I done? Can you tell me?" 

You shake your head, "Nothing really, I guess I'm just hangry. I'm sorry."

 He seems convinced that is as good an excuse as any.