Memories That Still Haunt Us

Chapter Eighteen:

The alarm doesn't wake me up in the morning. Instead, I stir awake on my own when I can no longer continue to sleep. I feel overly rested, unsure of when I even managed to fall back asleep as I stared at the ceiling for hours, traveling into the dark forest of my mind.

Only when I stretch in bed and wake from my deep slumber a bit more do I remember that I was meant to take Beck to school. I leap out of bed, check the time on my phone, and begin to panic.

It's nearly noon. How did my alarm not go off? Did I really sleep through it?

Shit. Shit. Shit.

I don't bother looking at my appearance, though I'm sure I look like an absolute mess. Hair probably sticking up all over the place, eyes red and puffy. Bolting down the stairs, my heart is thudding in my chest. My mind still lagging as it tries to catch up with the sudden movements. I never sleep this late, even on days when I'm not working. I guess being woken up by a potential murderer and having to sleep in an eerily quiet bedroom that looks like it's never been used before is enough to exhaust me to the point of sleeping in almost until noon.

I feel completely out of it. My eyes blink, adjusting to the bright sun shining through every window in the house. I move towards Ellis's office. When I see him sitting behind the desk, I try to think of what I'm going to say. Did he take Beck to school himself? I'm the absolute worst nanny. Then again, I've never been the greatest with kids, in all honesty. I've never been great at knowing how to talk to them or properly care for them. With Beck, it's been easy since he's so easy. He never fusses, never seems to be in a bad mood. Mrs. Bythesea wasn't lying when she said he rarely is anything besides his smiley self. Which, even compared to Ellis, is so different. Neither of his parents are smiley types. Neither of them radiates sunshine like Beck does. They're both rather dreary, always serious.

I knock lightly on the office door. When Ellis looks up, he waves for me to come in.

Opening the doors, I step inside his office. "I don't know what happened—" I start, placing my arms behind my back, I grab onto my wrist and rock back on the balls of my feet. "I set an alarm, but I must've slept through it."

"Clearly." Ellis replies dully.

"I'm so sorry."

"You've said that a lot to me since starting here." He stands from his chair, and even though he seems irritated with my inability to take his son to school on time, I'm still incredibly turned on by it. The way he looks at me makes me feel like he wants to consume me. How he walks towards me, demanding all the air in the room, taking every last breath from my lungs, claiming them his. The muscles in his forearms, sleeves pushed to his elbows. Bringing himself around the side of the desk, I watch as he leans against it, arms folding.

I imagine him punishing me here. Bending me over the desk. Pulling my pants slowly off as he spanks my bare behind, followed by hands exploring my body.

The thought makes it hard not to smile. I cross one leg in front of the other. I can't imagine what he and Mrs. Bythesea's sexual lives are like. I imagine it's lacking. That she's very traditional, never open to trying new things. Such a boring, vanilla wife.

"I mean it." I tell him.

His face relaxes slightly. "You had a scary night last night. I didn't plan on you taking him regardless. I would've told you to go back to sleep." He uncrosses his arms and presses his hands on the desk on either side of him. "Are you doing okay?"

I nod. "I'm fine."

"I hired someone to come handle the door this afternoon. I have to go into the office today."