His Jars of Hyacinths (STYLE)

14

POV: Kyle

oh god please not now

i rush into the stores public bathroom before Stan could object, already feeling the burning soreness rising in my chest.

when i make it inside, i instantly grab the bowl of the sink and start coughing, tears stinging my eyes as i gag.

two whole hyacinths, laced with my own blood, and traces of saliva too.

disgusting. makes sense, though.

i rub the tears off my cheeks, taking a deep breath to compose myself. my emotions run wild, and my throat aches with the expected after-pain of vomiting two whole flowers.

i should probably go see a doctor. this'll only get worse, won't it?

sighing, i turn on the tap and let the water wash away the blood. i wrap the now-clean flowers in some tissue, and shove them into the bottom of the bin. i didn't pack any jars, i forgot that i might have had to.

shame.

the door slams open as i wash my hands under the water, and i look over in surprise to see the one person we all would expect to be stood there.

"Oh. I thought you might've died." Stan smiles, laughing awkwardly, then pausing.

"No, I'm fine. Why?" i smile back, slightly nervous. he really has suspicions against me, i know it. i can tell.

he steps up to me, and places a hand on my cheek, taking me by surprise. my eyes widen slightly and i feel my face heat up at the new closeness between us.

he rubs his thumb under my lip, and i look at him in confusion and shock.

"Uh... Stan?" i look at him, and he steps back, seeming unfazed as he stares at his own thumb. i raise an eyebrow, very confused.

"This is blood." he says, looking back up at me with a concerned expression.

the comment takes me by surprise, and i look down at his hand which he was inspecting. his thumb had some smudged blood on it. oops.

i turn to the mirror, leaning in to look at myself properly, and surely enough, there was a small mark of blood trailing down from the corner of my mouth, now smudged by Stan's actions.

shit. how do i play this off? i mean - what was i expecting? some kind of moment between us?

"Oh, I didn't notice." i turn back to Stan, smiling in a reassuring way, but he just continues to eye me suspiciously.

"What was your illness again? I don't think you ever told me the name, or symptoms." he says, with a serious expression on his face.

"Uh, vomiting." i reply. "And coughing. Blood. Coughing blood. Why?"

he pauses. "How does that concern me?"

"What?"

"You said you couldn't tell me because it was «about me». How is that about me?" Stan raises an eyebrow, watching me intently.

this talk, in the bathroom, again.

"Oh, did I say that?" i laugh nervously. seriously, what am i doing. "I meant I didn't want you to worry, not that this illness thing is about you or anything. Because it isn't."

"Mhm." he hums, unconvincingly. he doesn't believe me.

we both stand there awkwardly for a moment, unsure on what to say. the uncomfortable atmosphere hangs in the air, until Stan breaks the silence.

"You should probably clean that off your face."

"Oh, right, yeah, thanks." i turn to the sink, and use the water to clean off the blood from around my mouth, as Stan watches every one of my movements like some kind of hawk.

once finished, i let out a sigh. "We should continue, c'mon." i say, smiling as we walk out the bathrooms together.

wow, that must look suspicious to strangers. two guys walking out a bathroom together.

we buy some snacks and a drink, then start walking together down the street towards Starks Pond.

the air between us is clearer, and i'd almost say Stan had completely forgot about the bathroom incident, but something about him still seems wrong. like he's still got some kind of question about everything that's happening.

we talk as normal, smiling and laughing at eachother. i'm happy to be spending time with him, truly. he's my super best friend, i don't know what i'd do without him.

his phone buzzes, and he pulls it out of his pocket, checking the notification.

"Oh, dude, I've gotta run. I'm supposed to meet with Wendy in ten minutes. Sorry," he smiles apologetically to me as my heart shatters.

"Nono, that's fine. Go with your girlfriend," i grin back, nudging him as he turns around.

he starts walking in the opposite direction, waving goodbye to me as he does so, then putting his phone to his ear as if on call.

i wave back until he leaves my sight, then i turn back around and start the walk home.

wow. just my luck.

the one day i thought i'd get to spend fully with Stan. i guess not though. not as long as he has someone else to love.

i don't blame him, though. Wendy's amazing, truly. he's happy with her, even if they have a very unstable relationship, she makes him happy.

i could make him happy too, if he gives me a chance.

he's blushed around me, i've noticed. i've seen the times his cheeks go red for things i've done or said, i'm not blind. maybe he is though.

i wouldn't be surprised if he didn't even realise when he was blushing. he'd probably assume he had a fever or something.

i laugh lightly, walking with the bags of snacks in my hands. i can give some to Ike.

am i going to die?

he's never going to love me. even if he does, he's never going to realise his feelings. Stan's always been, well, dim. even with all the times i've blushed infront of him, he rarely ever notices.

the guy's blind. he's really oblivious.

maybe he's blinded by his love for Wendy. that sounds really cringy.

so, i continue to walk home. i walk in the boiling heat, just me and my thoughts.

heartache.

[1024 words]