Silver-Lining (Ghost Riley x Reader)

Chapter Forty-Three

SOTD- Class of 2013 by Mitski and Family Line by Conan Gray

TW if you need it: Mentions of abuse and drug addiction (if you know what its like to have a family member addicted my heart goes out to you. It's a horrible feeling).

It started with the beige folder. The rough edges felt sharp against my skin. That very folder led me here. The small, one-story house that I grew up in. I stood in front of the home, my eyes scanning every part of it. The white paint slowly chipped off, showing the dark brown wood that kept the house standing. The gray shutters were loose and the lawn looked as if it hadn't been mowed in years. The bushes in front of the house were unkempt and overgrown. The beautiful tree that I climbed as a child was cut down, leaving an ugly stump in the yard.

I could feel a chill travel up my spine. It felt as if a black hole formed beneath me, swallowing me whole- engulfing my entire body into a sea of darkness.

I could feel the large hand squeeze my shoulder comforting. The comforting, warm touch belonged to Ghost. My heart pounded into my chest with a thump! I looked over at Ghost, melting into his dark brown eyes. He gave me a small head nod, reassuring me that it was okay.

It all started when I asked Price for a week off which he happily agreed. He told me I needed time outside of work. I then asked Ghost if he would accompany me since I didn't want to be alone.

He rubbed gentle circles on my waist that his hands were firmly planted on. "I don't wanna go alone." My voice was soft and shaky. I couldn't even think of doing it by myself. My hands were planted on his cheeks, caressing his warm skin softly. "I'll go." He told me.

Now we are here. Standing right in the place I dreaded so much. My parents didn't know of my arrival. I didn't even know how to go about it. Do I knock? Do I just grab the spare key and walk in as if I wasn't gone for the past nine years? "We can turn back around if you want." Ghost offered. I stood there with a sunken feeling that formed- no- clawed its way into the pit of my stomach. "No. I need to do this." I sucked in a deep breath.

The first step was the hardest. I was cut off by the front door opening. It was my mom. Gray hairs sliced deep into the brown ones that she had before I left. Her cheeks were sunken and her brown eyes were filled with sorrow and tire. Her back was slightly hunched and she wore a loose shirt and jeans. Her eyes littered over to mine, meeting my gaze.

My fingernails dug into my palm, creating a satisfying stinging pain. My heartbeat sped up and the breath I sucked in previously before remained in my lungs, making my lungs cry out for me to exhale.

Once I did I felt somewhat more calm. "Hello? Is there something you need, Miss?" My mom asked me. My gaze softened in a sense of sadness. She didn't recognize me. How could she? I looked completely different than what I did nine years ago. I put my piercings back in that I couldn't keep in the Marines. Tattoos littered my skin and I grew more muscle- not to mention I switched up my hair a bit. "It's me- y/n," I told her.

Her brown eyes widened, revealing the whites in her eyes. "What are you doing here?" She asked me. I stepped closer to her, my eyes not leaving hers. "A quick visit," I told her.

Her eyes flitted toward Ghost, earning an eyebrow raise as she looked at the masked man. "Who is that?" She asked me. "Ghost." She nodded her head slowly as she stepped to the side to allow me entrance into the house. I motioned Ghost to follow me.

My footsteps felt heavy as if I were walking underwater. My eyes danced around the living room. It was the same. Nothing changed. "Where's Sean?" I asked, motioning at the empty leather recliner where my dad always sat. "He's at work." She informed me. "I'll make some coffee." Her tone came off small as she brushed past me. Ghost remained by my side and he followed me down the hall.

I pushed open the door to my bedroom to see that it was still the same. "Your dad wanted to turn it into a man cave." She chuckled. "I wouldn't let him. It was all I had of you."

Tears pricked my eyes as I sucked in yet- another breath. I wouldn't allow myself to cry. Not in this house and not in front of her. I turned to look at her, my eyes scanning her. My gaze landed on her cubital fossa and saw slight bruising. Small holes were left there as if she had been pricked with needles one-too-many times. That's because she has. She's been abusing drugs again.

I let out a soft sigh, not wanting to bring up that conversation. "You look so different now." She spoke up quickly, trying to ease the awkward silence.

"Yeah. The Marines do that to you." I scratched the back of my neck, still keeping eye contact. "So that's where you went? Serving our country?" She let out a small chuckle as she led Ghost and I to the kitchen. "Not just our country." I corrected her. "And what about you, Ghost?" My mom asked as she poured the black, steaming liquid into a mug.

"I'm a Lieutenant on the Special Task Force that Knives is a part of." He kept it short and simple. His arms were crossed over his chest as he stood tall beside me. "Who is Knives?"

"That's me," I told her. She nodded her head as she handed us the cups of coffee. "If I knew where you were I would've written- if Sean would've let me." She fidgeted with her mug, looking down at the black liquid. "Uh- cream and sugar is in-" "I know where it's at. Thank you." I interjected as I opened the cabinet.

I poured in cream and sugar and sat down at the table. Ghost stayed standing as he leaned against the counter. "Your dad is gonna be off of work in an hour. If you want to stay for the time being I would greatly appreciate that."

I wanted to hate her. The countless times I awoke in the night and cleaned up her vomit that reeked of alcohol since she nor Sean would do it. I wanted to hate her for putting up with my dad. Letting him leave marks on her and treating the both of us awfully. I couldn't hate her. No matter how many times I saw or booked or drugged up. No matter how many times I had to be her therapist instead of her daughter. I always loved her. And I still love her even when she's abusing drugs again. The Marines were my escape. And this was hers. I knew I couldn't save her. As many times as I tried before, I couldn't.

"Yeah, sure." I agreed, taking a sip of the hot and sweet beverage. "I always thought about you. Even now while I was picking up I was thinking about you. I prayed every night that I would be able to see you again, even if it was just for one last time." Tears welled in her eyes, staining her cheeks with her tears. I reached over and wiped the tears from her face.

She grabbed my hand, squeezing it tightly. "I'm so sorry, y/n."

My heart sank and tears formed in my eyes, not completely falling. "I was a horrible mom. And it's too late to get that chance back- but I need you to know that I am so very sorry." She cried.

I blinked back the tears and nodded my head understandingly. "I know you are, and I forgive you," I told her, my voice coming out in a shaky whisper. She leaned her head into her hands, her body shaking as she sobbed. I turned over to look at Ghost, my eyes resting on his. No words needed to be exchanged between the two of us. Instead, he rested his hand on my shoulder once more.

The sound of the front door opening caught my attention, making my heart drop.