Worth The Fight ✓

Chapter Twenty Four

QUOTE OF THE CHAPTER:

"Fathers should make you feel safe."

― Karen Cushman, The Loud Silence of Francine Green

Dedication: @blarkey (because she's my witty reader.)

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CHAPTER TWENTY FOUR

Later that evening, I am lying on my grandma's lap as she is caressing my hair. Mum went upstairs after saying that she felt so tired and she was going to rest. I know how terrible it is for her to deal with; loss of her father.

"Grandma?"

"Yes dear," she murmurs, her fingers playing with my hair and it makes me feel surprisingly better.

"Where is Levi?"

"He has left in the morning when you were gone - where were you? - and he said that he'll come visit again...later."

"I was at a friend's," I answer. "Yeah, fine."

"Are you friends with Levi now?" She asks me. I know she's skeptical after all; yeah, she knows what happened between us. I used to tell her everything and she helped me a lot with her advices. One reason why I didn't go back to Brighton after the incident was that my grandparents continued to see Levi and his family. To me, it was rude - after all the things he had done to me. But right now, I get where they are coming from. Levi respected them as his own and because of me, they couldn't just give up on him. My grandpa didn't know about what happened of course but my grandma lost her previous interest in him after it. Levi tried so hard to gain it back, more than he's ever tried to gain my forgiveness, but my grandma has never treated him as before.

"Friends? No. But he thinks so."

She snickers.

I laugh back. "But I don't hate him as before."

"And why is that?" She always asks questions like a therapist. She tries to dig in and learn everything.

"Perhaps my attraction towards him faded away."

"Which means it moved on someone else, hmm?"

"Grandma," I protest. "Just ask it right away."

She laughs. "Okay then, what did I miss, Jacqueline?"

"Many things." I sigh, thinking about how much it passed and how many events I collected to tell her. "First off, people call me Jack anymore."

She grimaces. "Jack? Why do they call my daughter a boy name?" I love how she calls me her daughter.

"Because she wants it herself." She lifts her eyebrows. "Well, long story. But I'd much prefer if you called too."

"I'll call you Jacqueline, dear, not Jack. Nothing ever changes that."

I knew this will happen. "Okay then," -I sit up and face her- "After that summer in Brighton, I started to change. Be more violent, careless and all..." I tell her everything I have in mind: punching boys and girls, becoming a horror around school, threatening people, ditching classes... Long story short, I tell her Jack's story. Along the way, I tell her about how alone I felt. How my parents didn't care enough to care about me. How they neglected me.

"Darling, I am sorry." Her face falls as her eyes are fixed on me. "But it doesn't mean you have to pour it down on others, it is wrong. This isn't my daughter - this isn't my Jacqueline. I don't want to hear about you being violent again. You can't just punch people. It is wrong." She shakes her head with each word and her face is filled with sorrow and disappointment. I've never thought she would take it that serious. Maybe the situation is very serious but I'm used to it so much that I don't care hurting people anymore.